There is so much confusion around the addiction of cutting. It's hard for some people to understand why you, or someone you know, would repeatedly harm themselves on purpose. I want to break through the confusion and help those who practice cutting as a way of life. I've heard a lot of people say, why would anyone do such a thing as purposely cause pain to their bodies? So, let's begin to uncover the reasons why so many people cut themselves.
Most People Cut to Cover an Even Deeper Emotional Pain
As I have talked with hundreds of people that self-harm, one major reason emerges over and over again: Most people cut themselves to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. If you or anybody you know is cutting, please understand cutting is a way of covering something much deeper and painful going on inside.
Cover Self-Hate
An anonymous blogger put it this way: I used to cut because I felt like it was the only way to feel something other than the hurt and confusion and self-hate that was driving me insane. I would cut because I hated myself so much that I wanted to tear myself to pieces.
Cover Past Trauma
Most cutters' ability to cope with life is overwhelmed by powerful emotions or extreme pressure that seem too intense to bear. Jenessa said she's been a cutter for 7 years. I was sexually abused by someone very close to me. I started cutting because I always thought that what happened was my fault. I have never gotten over it, so I used to cope with any problem I had by cutting. Taking it out on myself was so much easier than figuring out what to do emotionally.
Can't Express Emotional Pain
When these emotions aren't dealt with, tension builds up. Cutting can feel like a release of this tension. Rachel said cutting is a way for her to deal with her pain: It's an escape from reality. No matter how temporary it is it's a relief to escape all the pain.
Most cutters struggle to express their pain to others. Without the words or outlet to express their emotional pain, they give into a short cut, a destructive physical expression toward themself. Laken said cutting is her first reaction when she feels disappointment or difficulty. When I fail a test, when I get in a fight, when I am called a mean name, or when anything bad happens the first thought is to cut. It is horrible and I always fall back on it.
The physical pain has a calming effect on her more agonizing emotional pain. Cutting is the treating of one pain with another. A cutter's life is one of the choices between one kind of pain or a much greater one. Amy said: It feels good when you have physical pain to take away from your emotional pain.
Avoid Dealing with Deep Feelings
The problem with self-injury as with any addiction, is that by harming yourself you never really are able to confront your deepest feelings. Perhaps that is you. You are using cutting to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. It is hard to say no to something that feels so good. But in the end, cutting will fail you every time.
Don't lose hope. There are healthy ways to deal with your emotions and to stop cutting for good. Check out these helpful resources on self-harm from TheHopeLine.
If you or someone you know is struggling with self-harm, check out TheHopeLine's free eBook.
My daughter is 27 and has been a cutter for a while now. She has just cut herself and is now in a hospital psychiatric ward. We live in different countries. I don't know what to do anymore. She sees a psychiatrist and a case worker.
I do go threw what you do. I hadn't cut for over two years, but last month something happened and I cut, it was like saying hello to an old friend. Not cutting is an every day struggle, I'm not saying it doesn't get easier as time passes but when that one moment comes when you can't think of anything but cutting it is the hardest choice you have to make. Other people don't understand, that cutters can be surrounded by people to talk to, but feel they can't talk to any of them. In my last post I said it's because we don't have anyone to talk to, that is what I ment. I was surrounded by people in my life, yet I was so alone, over time you just think no one wants to hear my problems. So you close into your self. Once I let my husband in it helped. He still doesn't understand, and I still have trouble talking, but opening part of me helps make it longer between cuttings. Now the hardest part is social anxiety. I can't talk to people. I am very shy You could say. I have no friends and no social skill to make new ones, I have a daughter that is shy to and I don't know how to help her. There is a lot more to cutting than just cutting. So if you need an ear I would love to listen.
i don't know why but i started cutting my self cause it felt like it was right to do
I wanted to add that when I used to cut it was a way to take control of some part of my life.. I always felt like everything was out of my control so causing myself physical pain meant that for that moment in time I was in control of my life. I alone could cause pain, and that pain would help me release would help me cope with the emotions I can't control. I was fighting back. Rebelling, against myself, my parents and the world that all seemed to fill me with hurt.
Ive only recently started cutting. I still think its such a bad idea and that no one should do it. I only do it to even things out. When i hurt someone, physically or emotionally, i feel the need to hurt myself in return. I dont cut because i have a bad life, or know bad people. I cut because i take advantage of the amazing people i have, i hurt them, so i should be hurt too. I do it on the palm of my left hand. I dont want any of my friends to know, as they all see me as the strong one. Im trying to make them not cut, but i cant stop myself from cutting. It really sucks but its the only way for me to forgive myself for hurting someone close to me.