There is so much confusion around the addiction of cutting. It's hard for some people to understand why you, or someone you know, would repeatedly harm themselves on purpose. I want to break through the confusion and help those who practice cutting as a way of life. I've heard a lot of people say, why would anyone do such a thing as purposely cause pain to their bodies? So, let's begin to uncover the reasons why so many people cut themselves.
Most People Cut to Cover an Even Deeper Emotional Pain
As I have talked with hundreds of people that self-harm, one major reason emerges over and over again: Most people cut themselves to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. If you or anybody you know is cutting, please understand cutting is a way of covering something much deeper and painful going on inside.
Cover Self-Hate
An anonymous blogger put it this way: I used to cut because I felt like it was the only way to feel something other than the hurt and confusion and self-hate that was driving me insane. I would cut because I hated myself so much that I wanted to tear myself to pieces.
Cover Past Trauma
Most cutters' ability to cope with life is overwhelmed by powerful emotions or extreme pressure that seem too intense to bear. Jenessa said she's been a cutter for 7 years. I was sexually abused by someone very close to me. I started cutting because I always thought that what happened was my fault. I have never gotten over it, so I used to cope with any problem I had by cutting. Taking it out on myself was so much easier than figuring out what to do emotionally.
Can't Express Emotional Pain
When these emotions aren't dealt with, tension builds up. Cutting can feel like a release of this tension. Rachel said cutting is a way for her to deal with her pain: It's an escape from reality. No matter how temporary it is it's a relief to escape all the pain.
Most cutters struggle to express their pain to others. Without the words or outlet to express their emotional pain, they give into a short cut, a destructive physical expression toward themself. Laken said cutting is her first reaction when she feels disappointment or difficulty. When I fail a test, when I get in a fight, when I am called a mean name, or when anything bad happens the first thought is to cut. It is horrible and I always fall back on it.
The physical pain has a calming effect on her more agonizing emotional pain. Cutting is the treating of one pain with another. A cutter's life is one of the choices between one kind of pain or a much greater one. Amy said: It feels good when you have physical pain to take away from your emotional pain.
Avoid Dealing with Deep Feelings
The problem with self-injury as with any addiction, is that by harming yourself you never really are able to confront your deepest feelings. Perhaps that is you. You are using cutting to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. It is hard to say no to something that feels so good. But in the end, cutting will fail you every time.
Don't lose hope. There are healthy ways to deal with your emotions and to stop cutting for good. Check out these helpful resources on self-harm from TheHopeLine.
If you or someone you know is struggling with self-harm, check out TheHopeLine's free eBook.
I am so glad your psychiatrist asked you about it. I know it's really hard to talk about and can feel shameful, but talking about it is important. There is a saying, "We are only as sick as our secrets." In order to get rid of the demons we have to bring them our of the dark and into the light. You can chat with a HopeCoach anytime - it is safe, confidential, and totally free. We understand and we really can help. https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/
I have not been cutting very long, only in the past several months. I cut to control my daemons, the screaming from my past that haunts me despite trying to get help to make it stop. I try not to cut too deep - less mess and easier to hide - and it keeps me from actually trying to kill myself. It calms me down enough to find something else to make the screaming stop, usually enough so I think to take my medication that is intended to calm me down. Only one person I know in real life knows I cut - my psychiatrist - and only because he directly asked after I was dumb enough to ask if he meant suicidal by 'hurting myself' in our last session.
It's not uncommon apparently for people who are traumatized to cut, but I still feel pathetic that it's the only way I can deal with what happened to me.
First word problems ...
Cutting or any form of self harm is not going to help! It in the long run causes even more pain and heartache - knowing you have scars for the rest of your life, some visible some not is not what you think about at the time - but please if you are thinking about cutting to feel better go for a walk, read a book, call a friend - just dont cut!
I used to cut myself because i felt like the physical pain was easier to stand that the pain i felt in my heart