There is so much confusion around the addiction of cutting. It's hard for some people to understand why you, or someone you know, would repeatedly harm themselves on purpose. I want to break through the confusion and help those who practice cutting as a way of life. I've heard a lot of people say, why would anyone do such a thing as purposely cause pain to their bodies? So, let's begin to uncover the reasons why so many people cut themselves.
Most People Cut to Cover an Even Deeper Emotional Pain
As I have talked with hundreds of people that self-harm, one major reason emerges over and over again: Most people cut themselves to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. If you or anybody you know is cutting, please understand cutting is a way of covering something much deeper and painful going on inside.
Cover Self-Hate
An anonymous blogger put it this way: I used to cut because I felt like it was the only way to feel something other than the hurt and confusion and self-hate that was driving me insane. I would cut because I hated myself so much that I wanted to tear myself to pieces.
Cover Past Trauma
Most cutters' ability to cope with life is overwhelmed by powerful emotions or extreme pressure that seem too intense to bear. Jenessa said she's been a cutter for 7 years. I was sexually abused by someone very close to me. I started cutting because I always thought that what happened was my fault. I have never gotten over it, so I used to cope with any problem I had by cutting. Taking it out on myself was so much easier than figuring out what to do emotionally.
Can't Express Emotional Pain
When these emotions aren't dealt with, tension builds up. Cutting can feel like a release of this tension. Rachel said cutting is a way for her to deal with her pain: It's an escape from reality. No matter how temporary it is it's a relief to escape all the pain.
Most cutters struggle to express their pain to others. Without the words or outlet to express their emotional pain, they give into a short cut, a destructive physical expression toward themself. Laken said cutting is her first reaction when she feels disappointment or difficulty. When I fail a test, when I get in a fight, when I am called a mean name, or when anything bad happens the first thought is to cut. It is horrible and I always fall back on it.
The physical pain has a calming effect on her more agonizing emotional pain. Cutting is the treating of one pain with another. A cutter's life is one of the choices between one kind of pain or a much greater one. Amy said: It feels good when you have physical pain to take away from your emotional pain.
Avoid Dealing with Deep Feelings
The problem with self-injury as with any addiction, is that by harming yourself you never really are able to confront your deepest feelings. Perhaps that is you. You are using cutting to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. It is hard to say no to something that feels so good. But in the end, cutting will fail you every time.
Don't lose hope. There are healthy ways to deal with your emotions and to stop cutting for good. Check out these helpful resources on self-harm from TheHopeLine.
If you or someone you know is struggling with self-harm, check out TheHopeLine's free eBook.
Have you seen our feature story this week about Michaela Hatfield? You can read it here: http://www.thehopeline.com/tags/cutting/
Cutting gives me a sense of control, but I do not know why..... I think that cutting is a very sad thing, but who am I to talk.... I can't even help my own cutting.
i understand i started cutting when i was 11 because of bullying and depression and right now im doing it bc i feel worthless in this world i dont know wat to do i got send away for suiciding myself and i dnt want to get sent away againg i love my family and friends i dnt want them to suffer againg i just want to say that i have ADHD bc of depression and anger i am getting to aggressive i punch the walls when im mad and cut myself when i am sad.
I started cutting because the pressure... It's just too intense. I have sharp hearing and hear all the dark comments people make, and I know of the way they speak of me. Every day I put on a smiling facade and when I get home, my family adds pressure upon pressure upon pressure, all my "friends" lie to me.... About so many things. I can't break away from all this stress and pain. I tend to be passionate, and it can go in many directions, causing me to feel pain very strongly. I am not willing to die so all I can do is cut my ankles. I don't know what to do..... But I know cutting can't help.
I can't believe I'm posting here, but I was touched by the comments. I cut because I hate myself sometimes. I feel like a malfunctioning machine that just can't do what it's supposed to. I rarely get urges to cause anyone else any type of pain, but I have no problem slicing my own arm with a pair of scissors. In fact, I have always been happiest when I am comforting someone else. I don't know why. I am overcome with a sense of loneliness. I feel like there is me in one corner and the entire planet in another. I have never felt like I belonged anywhere in the 22 years I've been on this planet. I have anxiety, depression and panic attacks. I can't think straight anymore. I don't cut when I'm just sad. I cut when the sadness is coupled with a rage that I can't even put into words. Rage at the injustice of it all. Rage that no one really hears me. But even through it all, I know there is good in the world. I know that I am lucky to wake upevery morning when the sun beams across my eyes. I guess what I'm trying to say is.... If I can do it, so can you. Every one of these comments made me want to give you guys the biggest hug in the history of hugs. Stay strong.
Whoa, that's exactly EXACTLY how I feel
Hi Samantha, I'm 25, and I too feel my happiest when comforting someone, and I am too overcome with a sense of loneliness that seems to never go away. It is when I have the intoxicating feeling that I've messed up again that I have the urge to cut, and it does make me feel better. And the scars, all I think about is, they are already there, I still have to hide them, so it doesn't matter how many more I'll add to the mix (I do however just cut in places where I already have very deep scar tissue to hide). Anxiety, depression and panic attacks. And the lack of belonging. Impressive, how similar we all are (the cutters) we should form a club.
I am so down for the club. Heck! We should have a freakin international conference!!! 😉 How amazing would that be?! The common symptom we share is this sense of doom - this aloneness - feeling of self-worthlessness - depression - anxiety - panic attacks, etc. This page itself motivates me to connect us all together. I don't know how to do it - but maybe we can make it happen. Inspired. Pain in the arm, but inspired.
Been a cutter for 25 years now noticing my kids have done this as well. It is an emotional release and very difficult to talk about with a doctor. The best thing is to figure out what is the cause of the emotional pain for one to stop cutting. It is a long process but worth it. Haven't cut in 2 years now hopefully will stay that way. Now have to work with the kids. Anybody know if maybe it's hereditary or not? Seems strange that I have 2 kids that do the same and their life isn't even close to what I had to deal with.