There is so much confusion around the addiction of cutting. It's hard for some people to understand why you, or someone you know, would repeatedly harm themselves on purpose. I want to break through the confusion and help those who practice cutting as a way of life. I've heard a lot of people say, why would anyone do such a thing as purposely cause pain to their bodies? So, let's begin to uncover the reasons why so many people cut themselves.
Most People Cut to Cover an Even Deeper Emotional Pain
As I have talked with hundreds of people that self-harm, one major reason emerges over and over again: Most people cut themselves to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. If you or anybody you know is cutting, please understand cutting is a way of covering something much deeper and painful going on inside.
Cover Self-Hate
An anonymous blogger put it this way: I used to cut because I felt like it was the only way to feel something other than the hurt and confusion and self-hate that was driving me insane. I would cut because I hated myself so much that I wanted to tear myself to pieces.
Cover Past Trauma
Most cutters' ability to cope with life is overwhelmed by powerful emotions or extreme pressure that seem too intense to bear. Jenessa said she's been a cutter for 7 years. I was sexually abused by someone very close to me. I started cutting because I always thought that what happened was my fault. I have never gotten over it, so I used to cope with any problem I had by cutting. Taking it out on myself was so much easier than figuring out what to do emotionally.
Can't Express Emotional Pain
When these emotions aren't dealt with, tension builds up. Cutting can feel like a release of this tension. Rachel said cutting is a way for her to deal with her pain: It's an escape from reality. No matter how temporary it is it's a relief to escape all the pain.
Most cutters struggle to express their pain to others. Without the words or outlet to express their emotional pain, they give into a short cut, a destructive physical expression toward themself. Laken said cutting is her first reaction when she feels disappointment or difficulty. When I fail a test, when I get in a fight, when I am called a mean name, or when anything bad happens the first thought is to cut. It is horrible and I always fall back on it.
The physical pain has a calming effect on her more agonizing emotional pain. Cutting is the treating of one pain with another. A cutter's life is one of the choices between one kind of pain or a much greater one. Amy said: It feels good when you have physical pain to take away from your emotional pain.
Avoid Dealing with Deep Feelings
The problem with self-injury as with any addiction, is that by harming yourself you never really are able to confront your deepest feelings. Perhaps that is you. You are using cutting to try to cope with an even deeper emotional pain. It is hard to say no to something that feels so good. But in the end, cutting will fail you every time.
Don't lose hope. There are healthy ways to deal with your emotions and to stop cutting for good. Check out these helpful resources on self-harm from TheHopeLine.
If you or someone you know is struggling with self-harm, check out TheHopeLine's free eBook.
hi, i'm so sorry I don't have advice for you, but wanted to thank you for your post. I have never cut myself, but I always have thoughts of cutting when I get upset. I am also saved and follow God and serve in my church. I felt like such a bad Christian to even have these thoughts which makes my eurg worse. hearing that I am not the only Christian that struggles really is helpful. not that your pain makes me feel better though. I think you should pray about what to do for your daughter. I wouldn't want to embarrass my daughter either, but in the long run she may be very thankful that you reached out to her youth pastor for her. Also she may feel alone or like the only one who struggles at her church, but please let her know she is not alone. They could make her feel better too.
thoughts and prayers for you and your daughter
People who cut themselves please realize that only Jesus Christ can fill up that hole that emptiness so that they can be set free from the demons controlling there lives only God knows everything we each have to go through, he understands each and every one of us but he came so that we could be set free!! If you're in ANY situation and don't see any way out just Claim the blood of Christ we have all fallen short of the Glory of God & he didn't come for the perfect ppl he came for sinners!! To prove his true love! You just had to believe that he died so that we can be liberated n healed and saved he will make a way where we don't see any way out, he makes the impossible Possible! God bless you reading this I pray that you may be touch by the Holy Spirit and have an amazing experience and can testify of the great things that God will do with you, if you just believe!! - I am just just a Christian (Pentecostal) Servant of Christ! But I know If he set me free he can do the same with YOU! In JESUS mighty name AMEN!!
I'm 19, and have been cutting since I was 10 years old. My mom found out when I was 13, and kept asking why I kept doing this to myself. It was and still is a way to release all the anger I've had pent up inside, it feels like it takes the pain away mentally, the physical pain just becomes so numb and you become so use to it and keep repeating for a little peace of mind. I've never been able to talk about the problems, I've had a hard time trying to find the words. So a razor was always my go to. Its kind of a reminder that your still alive basically. Believe me, I've tried to stop, it doesn't work. I've made so many promises that I would stop, but trying to tell a cutter to stop is like telling a drug addict to stop doing drugs. Its hard, trying to find new ways to cope is like looking for a needle inna hay stack.
I spent the better part of my 20's and 30's cutting myself. Not slight scrapes the I need alot of stitches kind of cutting. A doctor in the ER once told me I should be ashamed of myself (like I wasn't already). Then I experimented with sewing my own wounds which was interesting and led me to understand my need to control my physical environment since my emotional one was absolute chaos. There is hope though - I attended the SAFE program (self abuse finally ends). If anyone is out there struggling investigate the program. It works if you are 100% committed to ending the behavior.
Will someone please help me to understand this part of cutting...I feel like cutting has become more "popular", especially among teens. Teens who cut due to their emotional pain, do they tend to hide the cutting? Do they feel ashamed of their cutting? Is it possible that a teen will cut to seek attention? I know a teen who cuts, but then wants to show everyone her cuts. Obviously she is hurting, but I feel like it is more attention seeking and her way to deflect attention away from her own actions that caused her to feel her pain. Does that make sense? Can anyone give me some insight?
I can't speak for everyone here but I personally hide my cuts and scars, I feel like they're a sign of weakness. I hate when people see them and judge or pity me.
Oh, having to excuse the cuts away or even explain the real reasons why is a daunting thought. I hide them, for sure. No one in my life even knows besides my therapist. It's 80 degrees outside and I'm in long sleeves. I cut yesterday on my arm but when I have time to think it through, I'll cut my thighs, where my shorts cover. Yesterday was a bad, bad, bad day. I wish I could uncover my arms and not be ashamed, but people's judgments or looks or misconceptions about wanting attention because it's on my ARM would surely follow!!!