Abandoned: How to Stop Destroying My Life?

Barbie was abandoned by her parents, then friends and boyfriends. She eventually turned to dancing and drinking to try to feel better about herself.

Abandonment Issues Led to Destructive Lifestyle

Dawson: Hi Barbie!

Barbie: Hi!

Dawson: What’s going on?

BARBIE'S (LITTLE ROCK, AR) QUESTION: 

Barbie: I was an army brat – is what they would call it. My parents were both military bound and they were gone all the time. I’m guessing that’s where it started. But I ended up a well-rounded child most of the time until I hit adulthood. Now, I’ve taken up dancing. I bounce from relationship to relationship. I’ve even taken up exotic dancing and now, I drink a lot.

Dawson: What was it that sprung you into this destructive lifestyle?

Barbie: I kept getting left a lot…whether it was drugs or other women, there was always something that was better than me.

Dawson: So, it was not just your parents, it was guys you had been dating?

Barbie: It was friends. It was relationships. It was everything. In half the relationships I’ve been in were with one of my friends. They’d have other relations with my friends or something along those lines. I believe part of that drove me to dancing. To me, it made me feel more desirable. It helped boost confidence in a way. But then again that kind of job runs you to the ground because once you step home, that whole life is gone. All that attention is gone.

Dawson: And I’m not sure they were caring one bit about you.

Barbie: Probably not.

Dawson: Lust says, I’m craving for your body but not your soul.

Barbie: Right.

Dawson: Well, you’re spiraling out of control.

Barbie: Right.

Dawson: Are you going to remain a victim or what are you going to do?

Barbie: This is my first step. I’m willing to actually admit that I have a problem.

Dawson: You mean, talking to me is your first step?

Barbie: Right. I just feel like I’ve been blaming everyone else.

DAWSON MCALLISTER'S ANSWER:

Dawson: You’re going to need a counselor. I would suggest a spiritual counselor, because you have heavy God issues. You have tremendous shame issues. And that counselor needs to take you all the back to your mom and dad. Start down the road of forgiveness – asking for forgiveness and giving forgiveness. Good talking to you, Barbie!

TheHopeLine Team
For over 30 years, TheHopeLine has been helping students and young adults in crisis. Our team is made up of writers and mental health professionals who care deeply about helping others.
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