Posts by Dawson McAllister

Is Pornography Addiction Harming Your Relationship?

I’ve talked to a lot of young couples about relationship issues, and pornography is coming up more and more. People feel trapped by it and don’t want to talk about it. But whenever they do open up, they begin to experience freedom.

That freedom starts with understanding why porn use is holding you back from a healthier relationship.

If you have a porn addiction, it is easy to convince yourself that it doesn’t harm your relationship.

Perhaps your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t know about it, so you don’t think there’s an effect. Or maybe your partner knows you use pornography (or watches it with you) and doesn’t appear to have a problem with that.

But here’s the truth: more and more studies show that pornography addiction causes relationship issues for couples more often than in cases where no one in the relationship uses porn.

Emotional Impact of Pornography Addiction

Because addiction to pornography involves some unhealthy emotional patterns, it’s clear why using porn is connected to weaknesses and struggles in relationships, including:

  • Secrecy: Hiding an addiction means you cannot be truly open with your partner about your thoughts, your feelings, or the challenges you’re facing.
  • Shame: If using porn makes you feel ashamed, you might feel more withdrawn from your boyfriend or girlfriend than normal. That may mean you lash out in anger or bring conversations to a place of sadness or depression more than normal.
  • Fantasizing: Pornography is manufactured – it’s a fantasy that creates unrealistic expectations of sex and physical intimacy. For many couples, that creates strain. And it can sometimes even break a relationship.

If you’ve seen these issues, come up in your relationship, getting help with your porn addiction will be key to shifting the focus back to love, honesty, and being there for one another. And as soon as you start that work, you’ll be one step closer to conquering your relationship challenges.

The Effects of Porn are Real

Porn itself may be a fantasy, but the effects are real. Here’s what we learned from a Psychology Today report:

  • Relationships where porn is not used have lower rates of infidelity.
  • Relationships where at least one person uses porn increase both the likelihood and the frequency of infidelity (including cheating, hookups, and flirtatious behavior).
  • Porn use is likely connected to poor communication, and a decreased sense of commitment.

It’s important to remember that these findings were related to porn use (not specifically porn addiction). That’s why it’s so important to be vigilant about any porn use. If you make every effort to avoid it and to recover from your dependence on it, you’ll see great growth in your relationship.

Remaining Faithful During Recovery from Porn

Realizing the negative effects of pornography addiction is a harsh reality check, but there is no reason to despair. Faith and prayer can go a long way toward conquering anything, and God’s strength is always within your reach.

Amanda’s story is proof that there is always hope, and that trusting God to set you free is key to overcoming porn addiction:

“That cycle repeated endlessly for months. I would fall, pick myself back up, determined to “do better” or “try harder” next time, and then fall again. Finally, I was at the end of my rope. I thought I would never get out. How could that be?? This isn’t the kind of life God wants me to live, I know that, so why would He leave me stuck like this forever? There can’t be any way out, because God wouldn’t do that. He wants me to honor Him with my life, so why can’t I do that?! This thought brought me to the place I needed to be all along: on my knees before the throne of God. It was there that I learned a very important lesson. I can’t stay away from sin, and I can’t get out of the mess I made. God is the only one with the power to break me free, and all I have to do is go to Him and ask.”

I want to assure you: you and your boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse are not alone in battling the effects of porn addiction. God cares about your journey, and we are here to help you, too. Reach out today for confidential relationship support from our team of HopeCoaches.

If you are fighting an addiction to pornography, you are not alone...68% of men and 18% of women use porn at least once a week. Read 7 Steps Towards a Porn-Free Life for help.

Read More
Dating Reality Check: Is it Lust or Love?

When you feel a strong attraction to someone in a dating relationship, feelings make it difficult to know: is it lust or love? Understanding how each feeling is unique can help you set and maintain healthy boundaries with your boyfriend or girlfriend.

Attraction is Natural

I talk to a lot of young adults who feel guilty about having intense chemistry with their partner. But you don’t have to feel ashamed of those feelings. Sexual attraction is normal in romantic relationships. Our bodies and brains are wired to make connections with others, and attraction is a natural part of that process. When our hormones get involved, that attraction (and the sexual desires that come with it) can be very strong.

Since lust and love both involve feelings of attraction, I want to share what I’ve learned about how lust and love are different. I hope that it will encourage you to build healthy boundaries in your dating relationship.

Singular Focus on Sex

The easiest way to differentiate lust and love is to be honest about how you feel when you’re spending time with your boyfriend or girlfriend, or when you’re thinking about them. If you’re only thinking about:

  • Their body, especially anything about their features that makes you feel arousal or sexual desire
  • How far you can go with sex or physical affection, and how you can keep going farther
  • The next time you can be alone with them, so that things can get physical
  • How the relationship does (or doesn’t) satisfy your need for physical contact

Then I’d suggest opening up to someone you trust about struggling with lust.
Something to remember you can have feelings of lust without having had sex with your romantic partner. The key to knowing if you struggle with lust is being honest in your answers to questions like:

  • Is my primary reason for being with them, and being drawn to them, physical?
  • Would I still want to be with them even if they wanted to wait until marriage to be more physically involved than we are now?
  • Am I overly concerned about their appearance? Do I criticize them for gaining or losing weight, for not wearing makeup, etc.?

If the answer to those questions is mostly yes, be encouraged about this opportunity to grow and mature your relationship. And above all, don’t be ashamed to ask for help.

Help for Struggles with Lust

If you struggle with lust, that doesn’t mean your love life is doomed or that you can’t have a healthy dating relationship. There are plenty of ways to work through those feelings so that your relationship is guided by love, not lust.

  • Talk to your boyfriend or girlfriend about what you love about who they are as a person, and what they bring to your life. Focus on encouraging your partner about their strengths and virtues, not their physical appearance.
  • Share your struggles with the person you care about. Make a plan to set boundaries that stop physical contact before you feel a lack of control.
  • Put your faith at the center. God cares about you and your relationship. He wants to help you overcome your struggles with lust and have a healthy, happy relationship. You can reach out to God for help through personal devotional time, time with your faith community, or asking someone to pray for you.

I have no doubt that you care about your boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse. And I admire you for having the courage to think honestly about your relationship and work on it with hope and faith.

If you need confidential, one-on-one help overcoming lust to focus on love, sign up for an email mentor or chat with a HopeCoach at TheHopeLine today. We are here for you: you don’t have to fight any battles alone.

Are you having a hard time finding a deep, long-lasting relationship? Read How to Find a Meaningful Relationship.

Read More
These 3 Mindset Shifts Can Deepen Relationships

Everyone wants to have stronger friendships with friends, be closer to family, or deepen their dating relationship.

But I get it:  it’s easy to feel stuck or frustrated when a relationship doesn’t seem to move beyond the same challenges.

I’ve learned something that I want to share in order to help you get “unstuck”. One of the most powerful things you can do to make a relationship stronger is to change your mindset. While you should not remain in a relationship that is toxic or abusive, there is plenty you can do to overcome everyday relationship hurdles.

Over years of helping families, couples, and friends, TheHopeLine HopeCoaches and I have noticed three powerful mindset shifts that come up over and over again. Be encouraged: there’s a lot you can do to deepen relationships. Big changes in your life can start with simple changes in your mind.

Ask: Are My Expectations Realistic?

Whenever we fight with a loved one, parent, or spouse, it’s often because something they did or said fell short of our expectations.
That’s understandable. Anyone feels disappointed when someone doesn’t come through for us, says something harsh, lashes out unexpectedly, or does something out of character.

But if this feeling of disappointment or upset is a pattern, it’s necessary to ask: are my expectations realistic, or do they need an adjustment?

An adjustment of expectations could mean:

  • Letting go of perfectionism
  • Asking for help or support from a different friend or family member
  • Making sure they feel supported and that their struggles in the relationship don't come from feeling overwhelmed

Adjusting expectations to the strengths of the people you care about rather than focusing on their hang-ups can be very freeing and go a long way toward strengthening your relationships.

Be Honest About What You Can Change

Since it’s easier to see flaws in others than in us, it’s tempting for me to feel a strong push to help people I care about change a difficult or frustrating behavior.

But the only person whose behavior I can change, or whose choices I can have any lasting influence on, is me.

Being honest about what we can change in a relationship is key to having realistic expectations and setting healthy boundaries.
If you find yourself increasingly frustrated, don’t forget to let the person you care about know how you feel and what they can do to help. During your talk, ask if there is anything you can do to better support them.

Give Yourself Space

When you really care about someone, it’s easy to want to spend all of your time with them. This can sometimes lead to friction, conflict, and difficulty setting healthy boundaries.

Making an effort to give yourself space leads to greater independence and stronger self-esteem. Plus, time apart from people you love makes time together that much sweeter. Try taking yourself out to eat, going for a walk in the park, deepen your faith with prayer or devotionals, or try seeing a matinee movie. You never know, you might find a new favorite activity!

And don’t forget whatever difficulties you’re going through, God is bigger. Prayer and faith have helped me deepen my relationship with others when nothing else could.

If you’re feeling stressed about your relationships and aren’t sure what to do to make things better, TheHopeLine can offer relationship support through resources, mentoring, and more. We’ll help you make a plan for stronger relationships, and friendships that last.

Read More
How to Support a Partner Who's Been a Victim of Abuse

Dating and marriage relationships can be challenging especially when you or your partner have had a difficult past that includes abuse.

I understand how you feel. I care about people I love, and I don’t want them to hurt. But I also have to acknowledge that there are some things beyond my control.

If you have an abused partner, you want to be there to love and support them as they heal, but there are some important things to remember along the way.

You Can’t Solve the Problems of Abuse

Helping your boyfriend (or supporting your girlfriend) who has been abused can be physically exhausting and emotionally draining. To guard your mental health, it is important to have a clear understanding of what you can do to help and where someone else’s help would be more appropriate.
For example:

You can’t solve all the problems of abuse.

  • You can listen to them and do things to show you love and care.

You can’t diagnose your partner or tell them what to do.

  • You can recommend that they see a therapist, a doctor, a psychologist, a psychiatrist, or a pastor for expert emotional, spiritual, and mental health support.

You can’t listen non-stop to traumatic stories about your partner’s abuse.

  • You can ask them to talk about it at a later time, or to talk about it with their mentor or therapist.

Setting healthy boundaries for yourself is one of the surest ways to truly help your girlfriend, boyfriend, or spouse who has been victimized by abuse.

This may mean saying things like “I love you and want you to get help. But I don’t think I’m the best person to help you solve this problem. Can I share some ideas or resources that may help?”

Communicate as Often and Clearly as Possible

It is not always easy for a person who has been abused to talk about their feelings, to know how they feel, or to express their feelings clearly, especially if emotional abuse was integral to their previous relationship or their family dynamic.

Regular, clear communication is so important to healing together. Asking if they want to talk, what you can do to help, or how their recovery is going can help them open up. However, if it’s clear they’re having trouble processing things, don’t bombard them with questions. Let the one you love to talk about their experience when and where they feel most comfortable.

Don’t forget: if you are physically involved with your partner, they may have significant issues with intimacy as a result of their experiences of physical abuse, assault, or sexual abuse. Their consent is critical for physical intimacy or affection that builds trust.

Your partner may need lots of time and space to feel comfortable, even with hugging, handholding, or kissing. Do your best to respect their wishes and work together to find ways you are both comfortable giving and receiving love.

Be Faithful (and Joyful) Together

Because abuse is so painful, it is important to work together with your boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse to maintain faith that things will keep getting better, and joy over the good things in both your lives.

  • Encourage: Once a day, encourage one another. Take turns showing love and appreciate them through kind and affirming words.
  • Pray: You can pray for your abused partner, or request prayer for them at any time. If you have a common faith, share a prayer time together, or pray for one another throughout the week.
  • Focus on your faith: It always helps me to remember that God is a God of hope and mercy. Whatever I’ve been through in life, He has gotten me to the other side and helped me heal. He has given me fresh starts and new beginnings all over the place! Think of ways to show God’s love to your partner as they rebuild trust and heal from abuse.
  • Celebrate: Find ways to celebrate the good things and the recovery milestones in your relationship. Cooking a meal together, going to a concert, or visiting a new place are fun ways to create memories together that provide positive feelings about dating, marriage, and relationships.

No matter how you decide to help someone you love after they’ve been abused, I don’t want you to do it alone. TheHopeLine is here for you. We offer expert resources and confidential support for abuse recovery. You and your loved one can browse our library of blogs, podcasts, and ebooks, or get help from a mentor today.

For more information on abuse read my blog, What Is Physical Abuse?

Read More
How to Find God - EP 32

The Most Important Decision You and I Will Ever Make

The most important decision you will ever make is accepting Jesus Christ into your life. In this episode, I discuss the 4 spiritual laws which explain what we need to know in order to make peace with God through His son, Jesus Christ.

Law #1 - God loves you and offers a wonderful plan for your life.

  • John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”
  • John 10: 10b – “I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”

Law #2 - Man is sinful and separated from God; therefore, he cannot know and experience God’s plan for his life.

  • Romans 3:23 – “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”
  • Romans 6:23 – “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Law #3 - Jesus Christ is God’s only provision for man’s sin; through Him you can know and experience God’s love and plan for your life.

  • Romans 5:8 – “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.”
  • John 14:6 – “Jesus said, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

Law #4 – We must individually receive Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord then we can know and experience God’s love and plan for our lives. WE MUST RECEIVE CHRIST THROUGH FAITH! It’s a gift from God.

  • John 1:12 – “But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.”
  • Ephesians 2: 8 & 9 – “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.”

Receive Christ Through Simple Faith

Receiving Christ involves turning to God, from self, repenting and then trusting God to come into your live, forgive your sins and make you who He wants to you to be.

Have you ever asked Christ to come in your life and meant it? Have you put your faith in Jesus Christ, trusting Him to come into your life to forgive and cleanse you from all unrighteousness? If you haven’t, then now is the time to do it. Here is a prayer you can pray:

Dear Jesus,
I need you! I realize I have rebelled against you. I believe Christ has died on the cross for me and has died for my rebellion, sin, and garbage and has rose again and is alive. God allow Christ to come into my life. In Jesus Name, Amen.
If you prayed that prayer and meant it, and I believe you do, Christ has come into your life!!

Resources For New Believers:

  • If you accepted Jesus as your Savior, congratulations!! It’s an exciting day. Learn what comes next and find out more about the decision you just made on our Welcome New Believer page!
  • If you still are unsure about accepting Christ in your life or want to know more before praying, you can learn more about God here.

Need to talk to someone about God or how you are feeling, then: Chat with a HopeCoach at TheHopeLine.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope! 

Read More
Building Faith: Four Bible Verses to Heal a Broken Heart

If you are feeling brokenhearted, it can be hard to know where to turn. It’s overwhelming to deal with the painful realities that caused the heartbreak, and it can seem like things will never get better. In times like these, we realize that only God can give us true hope and healing, and that His word is full of encouraging verses to heal a broken heart.

God Knows Your Heart Needs Healing

It can feel very isolating when your heart is broken by a painful experience, especially because most heartbreak happens due to a sudden and acute loss, like the death of a loved one, or the end of a close relationship.

The scriptures show us that God cares about our hearts and is near us when we are in pain.

Four Verses to Cling to When Your Heart is Breaking

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.  -Psalm 34:18

Do you feel as though your recent heartbreak is crushing your spirit? God is closer to you than you realize, and He can save you from despair as you face your broken heart.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. -Psalm 147:3

God cares for each one-off us and knows the unique ways our hearts have been wounded by a painful experience. Just as a physician treats each patient differently according to their needs, God will help you heal from your heartbreak in exactly the way you need.

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners. -Isaiah 61:1

This prophecy from Isaiah was fulfilled in Jesus when he read it in the temple during his ministry. Though He healed many of their physical wounds and diseases to demonstrate His power, His main concern was spiritual healing for all of His beloved creation.

My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise. -Psalm 51:17

This was one of David’s prayers while he repented from grievous sins of adultery and murder. Whether or not you share any responsibility in the situation that broke your heart, you can know that no pain is too great for God to heal, and no situation is too terrible for Him to overcome.

Reaching Out for God

The important thing to remember is that God is close to you, even when it does not feel that way – and all you need to do is reach out for his help. You can do that through prayer, through reading scripture, and through spending time in worship.

If you’re not sure where to start, we can pray with you or connect you with a confidential mentor who can help you navigate your heartbreak and start on a path toward healing. We are here for you, and there is always hope!

Getting over a breakup takes time, but don't give up faith and don't lose hope. Read my blog, Moving On: How to Properly Grieve and Heal After a Breakup

Read More
Can I Keep My Heart From Breaking? - TheHopeLine.com

It seems like every great romance includes an inevitable heartbreak, but is there any way to prevent it? I wish there was. The fact of the matter is that there is no sure-fire, ironclad, 100% effective way to ensure that you can keep your heart from breaking while you’re dating.

But before you swear off relationships forever, consider that heartbreak, while painful, is not a bad thing. Here’s why.

Relationships Require Vulnerability

“Guard your heart.” You’ve probably heard that one a million times in your dating life, but there is a certain amount of wisdom in that phrase.

It’s not the best idea to open yourself fully to every potential love that comes along. Trust needs to be earned and established over time. Giving free access to your heart and soul cheapens the privilege of truly getting to know someone.

But guarding your heart doesn’t mean keeping it under lock and key. C.S. Lewis said it best in his book The Four Loves:

"There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.

But in that casket – safe, dark, motionless, airless – it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."

A lack of vulnerability means that we are constantly keeping people at an arm’s length in an effort to preserve our own ego.

Vulnerability demonstrates the willingness to be fully known – for the good parts and the not-so-good – and this can be terrifying even for the most confident people. While this kind of openness invariably puts you at risk of getting hurt, that divine gamble is an essential element in the process of developing a relationship.

Your willingness to be vulnerable, whether it is through opening up about your fears or confessing insecurities, shows a level of trust that must form the bedrock of successful relationships.

People are Fallible

While vulnerability is paramount to healthy relationships, even the most carefully vetted people may hurt us. In some circumstances, you may come to the astonishing realization that the person you thought you were growing closer to is farther away than you ever imagined. The world of relationships is full of people who may hurt you intentionally, but even those with the purest intent will let you down simply because they are human.

In spite of what the movies may preach, Mr. or Ms. Right will let you down – and probably more than once. Maybe even to the point of heartbreak.

Being part of an authentic relationship affords you the honor and the responsibility of truly knowing another person – and this includes their flaws. It’s really just a matter of deciding if those flaws are outweighed by the person’s goodness.

Relationships May Not Satisfy

Ask any married person, no matter how long, and they will tell you that they’ve experienced deep, true loneliness, even after marriage.

We’re often sold the idea that relationships are the key to patching up all the holes left in our heart by loneliness. How could we ever feel unfulfilled when there is another person entirely dedicated to making us feel important and loved?

Hopefully, that question struck you as a bit strange. At the same time, I think if we’re honest with ourselves, a lot of us go into relationships hoping that this will finally be the thing to make us feel whole, attractive, needed, smart, and everything else.

Relationships – familial, friendships, or romantic – are a beautiful part of life. None of us is an island and we do truly need one another, but to allow your self-esteem to be based upon a single relationship places unfair pressure on another person who is, for better or worse, a human being with flaws. Even the strongest relationships can hurt your heart from time to time.

What You Can Do

You are going to get hurt. That’s for sure. But what you do with that hurt is the key.

Like Lewis said, maybe the fear of pain will cause you to lock yourself away and make a fortress of your heart. You may not hurt further, but you run the risk of shutting out those who truly want to know you.

Or maybe you’ll let your pain propel you. Perhaps you’ll let every heartbreak remind you that, while things may not get better, you can get better. Maybe you’ll rest in confidence knowing that every act of vulnerability after heartache displays courage and shows that you are worthy of love, however, and whenever it comes.

Worthy Of Love

I find it is of great comfort to lean on God's love, when imperfect love from other people fails. God's love for you will always remain steadfast.  It never fails. Even when life gets tough, God is still for you. He is waiting for you to turn to him and to see how he is at work in your life.

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." (Lamentations 3:22-23)

Even so, God did create us to live in community with other people and to love each other.  So, take the risk and open yourself up.  And if you get hurt, remember, that while working through some of the issues on your own is important, support is also necessary for healing.

If you’re looking for a support network, TheHopeLine’s HopeCoaches are available to help you on your unique journey.

Putting yourself out there in the dating world can be stressful...for more on dating relationships read my blog, The Secret Behind a Healthy Relationship.

Read More
Chronic Illness: Should I Take a Break from School? EP 31

My Health or School

“For a few years now, I’ve been really sick. Now, I’ve had a biopsy done on my lymph nodes to see if I possibly have lymphoma. I found out today, that I failed my last class in order to graduate.” ~ Lauren

It all started with Lauren feeling really sick and then being diagnosed with hyperthyroidism. Now, Lauren is being tested for lymphoma (a type of cancer). Just today, she found out she failed her last class by 2 points, so she’s not going to be able to graduate and walk across the stage with her class.

She wants to know, should she take a break for a semester and slow down to take a breath? Or should she jump right back in, push through, and take the same class again to hopefully pass this time?

Lauren is a hero! She could have folded up the tent with all her challenges, but she hasn’t. It’d be different if she was out partying, getting drunk, being crazy and acting out but she wasn’t.  She’s persevering in the midst of very hard things and battling this, which is no walk in the park. Let’s get some encouraging messages for Lauren.

Peer to Peer: Messages of Encouragement for Lauren

We asked for you to call in and share hope and encouragement with Lauren. Here are some of your messages!

It's Okay to Take a Break from School

Kaleigh encourages Lauren, “I just want you to know there is hope!” Kaleigh says something with Lauren just resonated with her. You are a strong person. If you need to take a break from school, then that’s okay because you have to take care of yourself.

It’s Not the End of the World if  You Don’t Get to Walk

Leon says one of his friends went through stage 4 prostate cancer in the middle of school. His friend was given a low percentage to get through it and live and he got through it. Leon said, Lauren, you are strong, and you will get through this! Leon has struggled through college. His sophomore year he had to sit down with the dean and was told if he didn’t make a certain GPA he was going to be kicked out of college. Sometimes you are going to fail. It sucks but you have to pick yourself up. It’s not the end of the world if you don’t get to walk. If you have to take a semester off to make sure you are healthy; in your heart, you will make the best decision for yourself. If you have to choose health over school, I think you will make the right decision.

Your Health Must Come First

God Bless! Jeremy relates to Lauren’s situation. His 8-year-old daughter was diagnosed with brain cancer. She went through chemotherapy and now has been cancer free for 2 months. He says, your health must come first. You can always go back to school next semester.

Do What You Need to Do

Zinna is dealing with problems with her iron levels. She could die at any time but still goes to school. On top of that, Zinna gets bullied. Zinna says to Lauren, God is here for you and He won’t give you anything you can’t handle. He knows you are strong, and you can handle this. If you need to take a break from school, then do it. We are all here for you!

What advice would you give Lauren?

Have you had health issues which prevented you from doing something or delayed you in your journey? Or have you failed at something and found a way to persevere and overcome? Then would you share your story in the comments below? What you have to say could be the encouragement Lauren, along with others, needs to find hope in their journey.

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

Lauren is so close to her goal of graduating. She’s just wanting to finish, be able to walk with her class, and start the next phase of her life. Unfortunately, circumstances beyond her control have happened, and her health issues are causing her to make some difficult choices. If she starts back to school immediately, she may not be healthy enough to have the energy to do all that is required of her. Lauren needs to take time off and focus on her health. School will always be there. They have it every semester.

Resources For School Pressures and Stress:

Check out my blogs:

Need to talk to someone about how you are feeling, then: Chat with a HopeCoach at TheHopeLine.
One last thing,
My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope! 

Read More
Having a Panic Attack? Here's What to Do

Psychology Today reports that a recorded six million adults in the U.S. have a diagnosed anxiety disorder. Taking into consideration just how common anxiety is among Americans, knowing what to do when experiencing a panic attack can be the key to helping yourself or someone else in a potentially dangerous situation.

What Causes Panic Attacks?

The underlying cause of a panic attack could be a number of things.

Anxiety attacks can be caused by mood disorders like anxiety and depression, extreme stress, abuse of substances (alcohol, nicotine, caffeine), physical health problems, or even as a side-effect of medication.

Even if you don’t have an extensive background in psychology, you’ve probably heard of the “fight or flight” response, your brain’s reaction to danger. This response is similar to what happens in the brain during a panic attack.

According to Scientific American, “When people feel stressed, their sympathetic nervous system typically revs up, releasing energy and preparing the body for action. Then the parasympathetic nervous system steps in, and the body stabilizes to a calmer state. If the parasympathetic nervous system is somehow unable to do its job, a person will remain fired up and may experience the heightened arousal characteristic of a panic attack.”

Essentially, during a panic attack your body is having a heightened response to a perceived threat, resulting in some of the physical symptoms of a panic attack.

Identifying a Panic Attack

To differentiate a panic attack from another health problem, be on the lookout for the following symptoms.

Panic attacks can manifest in different ways for different people, but according to Psychology Today, many of the common symptoms include “fast breathing, severe perspiration, trembling, nausea, dizziness, numbness or tingling, chills or sensations of heat, and increased heart rate . . . extreme fear . . . feelings of disconnection from oneself, loss of control, imminent danger, and a strong desire to flee or avoid the situation.”

It is important to note that some of these symptoms do mirror other health issues like heart attacks or respiratory conditions, so personal medical history should always be taken into consideration when determining whether or not you are experiencing a panic attack.

What to Do

Above and beyond all else, if you are experiencing a panic attack, anxiety, or other problems related to your mental health, seeking help from a counselor or other medical professional is paramount to learning how to manage your symptoms and beginning a journey toward better health.

In the meantime, there are some actions that professionals suggest you take immediately if you are experiencing a panic attack.
One of the first steps you can take to help alleviate panic is to simply recognize that you are experiencing an anxiety attack.

Some professionals suggest that by reminding yourself that this is a panic attack rather than a heart attack or death, your mind is calmed and able to understand that the episode will be over soon.

Grounding yourself is another helpful method to quelling panic. Many anxiety sufferers feel a lack of connection with the physical world during episodes of panic because they are caught up in mental distress. Engaging the physical body can help you feel more grounded and in control of yourself during these episodes. Psychology Today suggests a number of physical practices to help anxiety sufferers reconnect with the physical world. Focused breathing techniques, visually fixating on a stable object, or even holding an ice cube can help to bring your mind back into the physical world and alleviate a panic attack in the moment.

If you’ve experienced what you believe is a panic attack, these methods can be helpful for mitigating the situation as it arises and finding calm. Even so, consulting a licensed professional is necessary to taking steps toward diagnosis of any sort of mood disorder.

By visiting a therapist or counselor, you can discuss your specific anxiety symptoms and they can help tailor your treatment methods to your specific needs.

For more information, or to talk with a HopeCoach about your next steps, check out TheHopeLine’s resources to begin the journey toward wellness and hope.

To learn more about God’s love for you and his desire to bring peace into your life, check out these resources.

Find answers to your questions about anxiety at our anxiety page that is full of blogs, ebooks, podcasts, stories and more.

Read More
1 22 23 24 25 26 44

Tired of The Problem?  Try the Solution.

Privacy Policy / Terms of Use
© 2024 TheHopeLine, Inc. Registered 501(c)(3). EIN: 20-1198064
© 2021 core.oxyninja.com. Powered by OxyNinja Core
magnifiercross