1. Do You Truly Hate Yourself?
Self-hate is a dark, black hole in our soul that can be easy to fall into, but difficult to get out of. Last week I wrote about some of the reasons why people hate themselves. I want to give you some things to do when you feel like you hate yourself and you say things like, "I hate myself, I'm no good, I'm so stupid, or I'm worthless."
The truth is you are NONE of those things. But it's easy to think you are, especially if you have been believing all these negative thoughts about yourself.
So, what do you do to climb out of the dark hole in your soul?
2. Decide what you want to change about yourself
Nobody can make you love you other than you! It's your responsibility to rearrange your thinking away from all the negative stuff you've been thinking and think more positive thoughts about yourself. It's often been said, "If I think better, I will act better. And if I act better, I will feel better."
Cody wrote: I've found that sometimes our greatest enemy is ourselves. And the way we think can hurt worse than any words. And when left with nothing but your own thoughts, and if those thoughts are negative, self-hate is born.
It takes a real effort to turn negative self-defeating thoughts into positive life-changing ones. But try it! And if you stick with it, you soon will see you're feeling better about yourself.
If you don't like something about yourself that you can actually change, start to do that today.
3. Figure out what you CAN change and do it!
IF you hate yourself, is there a specific thing that you hate? If you don't like something about yourself that you can actually change, start to do that today. Maybe you don't like your weight you can start eating properly and getting exercise TODAY! Get involved with a sport or a favorite hobby. You'll be amazed by how good it makes you feel to take care of yourself.
Don't obsess over what you think are your flaws. Work on what you can change and ask God to help you accept the rest. Create the healthy life you desire (and deserve!) some people get trapped living miserable lives, not realizing they have the ability to change their situation. Don't get stuck in that trap!
4. Build up your self-esteem by making a list of your 10 best qualities:
Can't think of 10? There are more than you think but try starting with one. For example, I am a loyal friend or I care about others, or I am in touch with how I feel, or I have a lot to offer my friends, or I am a good listener, etc.
Find out what your friends and family value about you. You might be surprised to find out what the people who love you see in you! As you begin to dwell on the good things you offer, your confidence will grow.
Others will take note of it because you will have made yourself more attractive.
Betsy wrote: Since I stood up for something, people started to respect me and I was able to find confidence in myself. You can't please everyone, so focus on making yourself proud before you expect anyone else to be proud of you.
Each day, find something to do that makes you feel proud of yourself. Discover the things you love, try new things, go to new places. Make some short-term and long-term goals.
Decide that you will never say the words, "I Hate Myself" ever again. Those words are toxic. Why hate yourself? When in reality there is a lot in you worth loving.
5. Use gratitude as a weapon against self-hatred
You will find people who dwell on the positive things in their life...things for which they are grateful, are usually much happier than those who don't.
Negative thoughts, mixed with worry, make a person miserable to live with.
So, if you are tired of hearing the same old, negative thoughts, make a daily list of the things you are grateful for, and you'll be surprised at how quickly your attitude begins to change.
Challenge yourself to reflect each day for just a minute or two about what you feel grateful for that day...maybe it was delicious pancakes for breakfast, a smile from a friend, nice weather, could be something as simple as the color of the grass, or a good grade on a quiz. It doesn't have to be what you know you should be thankful for, but something that you actually feel grateful for.
Remember God loves you
The most powerful way to overcome self-hate is to focus on God's love. After all, if God loves you, and He does with all of your faults and hurts, it should make it easier for us to accept ourselves. Let God change what He wants to change, and you'll feel much better about your life.
God made you very unique. And it's this uniqueness that makes you special.
Please stop hating someone God loves so much. YOU!!
Angie wrote: It's very easy to find reasons to believe I am of no value to anyone, or to God. But I am of value because God loves me, even if no one else does.
As you start believing in yourself more, you'll have more good days than bad. It's easy to find the negative, so look for the positive in each situation. And most importantly, keep your faith in God this will help lead you to the happiness you seek. Please stop hating someone God loves so much. YOU!!
Don't stay in that place of self-hate, it's going to take time to change what you think about yourself but it's possible. Check out one of my other blogs about self-hate: Why Do You Hate Yourself.
And check out this blog to start to begin to change this part of your life: 6 Steps To Change Your Life.
Im writing to everyone this is not me writing its God please dont ever think you are worthless or dont mean anything. I came down from heaven to die for you as a person through my son Jesus He died for all your sins. Please you are worthy i made you in my hand you mean everything to me. My daughter brittany who i am using goes through things but im there for her and i can be there for you just believe in my son Jesus Christ He died for your sins and wants you to know HE loves you. Believe He died for you and died for your sins and i raised HIM up from the dead and you will be saved. My Word is true you hear false things about me i am not evil i am justice i am Love Love you never knew the world love is not real thats lust. My love is unconditional love that never ending. if your hurting, in pain, sick, confused any negative feelings come to me and ill give you rest. Nothing can satisfy you accept ME. I am the creator of Heavens and Earth. Come to me. I will never deny you. theres an enemy out there whos evil hes trying to decieve you and bring you to disppear and live in sin i am the one who can free you from everything just call out my name, Jesus!!!,i am here. i love you all so much please dont be scared i got your hand. i overcame the world i can fight your battles you can not do it yourself theres a enemy whos stronger than you but I am stronger than that enemy. i overcame him his names the devil hes the deciever. dont be decieved hes the one who tries to lie about me so you dont believe in me. Dont believe that lie his job is to steal kill and destroy and i came to give everlasting life more abundantly trust me my children i got this take my hand dont ever give up i am here always 🙂
thank you I am feeling so much better now but I still have hate...
The only things that made me happy were my wife and kids, especially my daughter. My wife has left me so now all I have ate my children. And no, my wife leaving didn't cause this. Ive never bern particularly happy, my wife and kids were just bright spots in my life
he never abandoned you, In those years of pain did you ever ask for help? get down on ur knees and pray and tell him everything u feel even scream at him telling God u feel like he has abandoned you, I know how it feels to be all alone trust me. But I was actually never alone not once God was always there I just needed to seek him. He loves u with all his heart, don't forget that. (I'm only 13 and have been through an abusive step-parent, my mums best friend sexually assaulting me and nobody believing me, my real dad leaving me because I wasn't good enough for him, and so, so, so much more, but through all of that God was there for me I just had to ask for help, and get on my knees and pray he has changed my life for good)
Your dad is a foolish man indeed.You are a wonderful person, and with God, you will reach your full potential.
I hate myself and I need help. I feel like everyone hates me and I am not cared for. I have bad grades and get yelled at a lot. I need help.