Do You Wonder Why You Hate Yourself Even When Others Like You?
It's so tragic to hear someone say I hate myself. But down deep, many people do. Do you hate yourself? It seems there are so many things in this world that attack our self-esteem and sense of worth. When you hate your life and yourself, it feels like you're in your own personal jail, full of self-loathing, desperately wanting to get out, but not believing they can.
Can You Relate to Caroline?
Others may think you are just crying out for attention. But the feelings are very real. You are miserable because of how you feel about yourself, even if it sounds exaggerated or overly dramatic. I believe you.
Caroline described her self-hatred like this: I hated myself because I thought I wasn't good enough to be in this world. I thought I was ugly, stupid, and weird. I wished I could have been someone else.
So why do people hate themselves?
We took a poll and asked what reasons you might have to hate yourself. The majority of people said it was something about their appearance, followed closely by I didn't feel loved, and then I failed at a relationship. Each of these could be their own articles.
Blame Ourselves When Bad Things Happen
When bad things happen, we often blame ourselves. It's easy to let this blame turn into self-hatred and suck the very life out of us. This can leave us depleted of any kind of self-worth or love. When bad things happen, the worst thing you can do is spiral down into self-pity.
Sometimes self-hate is emotional exhaustion from the blame game. It's important to remember that painful, challenging, and hard times are going to happen. Sometimes you just need to give yourself a break and get some rest. You will look much better to yourself when you get some rest and forgive yourself for any mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes.
Rejection or Abandonment
Everyone will experience rejection of some sort. It's normal. But it's difficult. Not everybody is going to love you or accept you.
But it doesn't mean you're a bad person, and that you should hate yourself because of it.
Tom wrote: I used to live consumed with thoughts about what everybody else was thinking about me. I felt like people were constantly rejecting me. All the worst things came to mind, even though there was no way of actually knowing what people were thinking. I had to quit, or else I'd go crazy.
Sometimes when people experience rejection or abandonment, they turn the responsibility onto themselves, as if they are the ones who caused the pain. Don't let what other people think about you determine what you think of yourself. The freedom you experience when you let go of this burden like Tom did, will give you great joy. He's right, it's not worth going crazy over something you really can't control.
Negative Self-Talk
Thinking poorly about yourself is kind of like self-rejection. You see something about yourself that you think is stupid or ugly and you think criticizing yourself about it will somehow make it go away. It won't. It will actually make it worse. A lot of people feel ugly. Lazy. Inadequate. It's like the whole human race suffers from deep, low self-esteem.
Mona wrote: I hate who I've become. I know there is a hardworking, honest, skinny person inside me somewhere, but most of the time I think about how far to the negative I've come, then get even angrier at myself for not working harder to become the person I know I can be.
The Fight Against Self-Hate
The fight against self-hate is an on-going battle in all of us. Some struggle with it more than others, to the point of depression and suicidal thoughts. But it seems to always be there working in the shadows, waiting to pounce on us, and take us down. One thought that has helped me in this struggle is God's love for me.
I ask myself, "Why should I hate someone God loves so much? Why should I slap Him across the face? He's the one who made me, and He did it for a very special reason." There is no one else in the whole world who is just like you or me. Isn't that incredible? That person, YOU, is worth loving.
So how do you climb out of the dark hole of self-hate? Check out 5 Things to Think or Do When You Hate Yourself.
I hate myself because lately I feel like I can’t do anything right. I feel like I cant forgive myself for making mistakes and that nobody else can too.
I hate myself, because I feel ugly, worthless and miserable most of the time. I hate myself because, I succumb to my rage and make others feel bad. I hate myself for feeling jealous, lonely, insecure, beaten, stupid, smart, pretty, ugly... I really, just hate myself and I wish that no one else would experience me; I wish I was dead.
Peter, Please don't give up. Giving in to your anger is human and there are ways to learn how to deal with the rage. There are people that care. God loves you just the way you are. You are valuable and worthy in His eyes. It’s good you are reaching out to talk about this. How about chatting online with one of our HopeCoaches at ttps://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ they will listen and help you through this. We are proud of you for reaching out to talk about how you feel. You have to take the first step...now to continue to talk and open up to heal. We have some resources we can give you to help you with these thoughts too. We have a partner that you can help you through this as well and we are emailing you with some information to help you. So please check your email. If you need someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/. You can reach the Crisis Text Line 24/7 by texting “START” to 741-741 too.
Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources.
I hate myself because I procrastinate, and I often miss my deadlines for assignments.
I hate myself because my arms are chubby and my stomach sticks out a little too much.
I hate myself because I allow my emotions to control me.
I hate myself because I often succumb to peer pressure.
I hate myself because my laugh is absolutely stupid.
I hate myself because I let everyone in my life down.
I hate myself because I have panic attacks too often.
I hate myself because others see themselves in me.
I hate myself because I miss my friends.
I hate myself because I'm not beautiful.
I hate myself because I don't know how to relax.
I hate myself because, well, I hate myself.
Morgan, You are beautiful, worthy and loved. The Lord is with you through the pain. He comforts you in the waiting. When you’re anxious about your future, He gives you courage. As you climb the mountain, He keeps you safe in His arms. In every moment, God is with you. We care and are here to listen.
Well i certainly don't hate myself which i really hate God for punishing me by not giving me a good wife and family that i really wanted instead of being a single and very lonely man today. It would've been really great for a good single man like me to have a good woman to share my life with since so many billions of other people in this world have really been very blessed and lucky to have that which really makes their life so very much complete. And being a single man has a lot of disadvantages unfortunately since we really are all alone wherever we decide to go which is no fun at all either. Try eating out in a restaurant for example all by yourself, and most of the time we feel like an outcast since people will stare at you like you really don't belong there. Most people are very rotten in this world anyway the way that i look at it unfortunately. God created just too many very evil and nasty women nowadays too which makes it very hard for many of us good single men looking for love. There are times when we will get Cursed at by these women for No Reason at all when we will just try to start a normal conversation with them by just saying Good Morning Or Hello to hopefully get to know them better. And i already had this happened to me already and so have other friends that i know as well. And it is a real shame that God didn't create women like the good old days when Most of the women in those days were certainly Real Ladies and the very complete opposite of today which it definitely would've been very easy meeting a good woman to settle down with. I will certainly admit that being single really does suck altogether since it really has many disadvantages like i mentioned already. A very bad time for many of us good men trying to find love these days since we really can Blame the type of women out there that God created today unfortunately.
Seems like the common denominator in the problems you described is yourself. You need to do a personal inventory and some serious self-reflection before you can expect to find a meaningful relationship.
The way you talk about women is disgusting and ill-willed. You should start your self-reflection with that.
Sincerely,
"good men"
I hate myself because I feel like no one likes me.
I hate myself because I don't feel like I am being loved.
I hate myself because I blame on others too often.
I hate myself because my English is not good and I let my parents down.
I hate my family because they can't give me anything.
I hate myself because I can't accomplish anything.
I hate myself because I can't have what I want.
I hate myself because my emotions control me too much.
I don't think I hate myself because I do not;
I just hate that life didn't give me the amount of care that I needed.
I hate myself because I like being different and nobody cares about me being different.
I hate myself because I can't do what I want to do.
I hate myself because I set goals that I can not achieve.
I hate myself because I can't get all A's in all my classes.
I hate myself because I don't feel like doing homework.
I hate myself because no one compliments me on anything I do when others feel like it's my nature to compliment them.
I hate myself because everything is always because of myself.
No, I don't hate myself; I hate others.
i hate myself because Im always in a middle of the fight
i hate myself because of my low grades for Chinese
i hate myself because i let my parents down
i hate myself for being scared to lose friends
i hate myself because i cant control my emotions
i hate myself because i cant tell anyone in the world about my TRUE feelings
i hate myself because of that Im not skinny
i hate myself because i cant stand up for myself
i hate myself because Im too weak with my words
i hate myself because Im too nice
i hate myself because i lost my best friend
i hate myself because i don't know what to do when i am so stressed and sad
i hate myself because i made friends with people who do self harm
i hate myself because i get 0 support
i hate myself because i cant get any hope most of the times
i hate myself because my friend that i can only really open my self to is far away from me
i am disappointed with my parents because they give me no support
i am disappointed with my parents because they are really biast
i hate my friends because they don't support me
i hate my friends because they get mad at me when i support them and they get mad at me when i dont
i hate my teachers because they only like the most smartest students
i hate my life because i'm not sure about my career
i hate myself because i cant do anything
i love myself because i can at least have some minutes a day to look at BTS
i love myself because i respect everyone
i love myself because i know who i am
i wish i can have someone to tell my feelings