Top Two Reasons You Should Stop Lying PLUS How Liars Get Caught

In my blog How to Stop Lying I listed eight things you can do to help break the bad habit of lying.
But I don’t just want to give you tips on how to stop lying. I want to motivate you by giving you two very important reasons WHY you should stop.

Top Two Reasons You Should Stop Lying

First of all, NOBODY wants to be friends with a liar because liars can’t be trusted, and they hurt other people with their lies…often in order to protect themselves. If you desire any REAL relationships in your life, you need to be trustworthy.

Second, liars will eventually get caught, and deservedly so. Lying is a destructive force and it will catch up to you.
In fact, I want to use the rest of this blog to help protect people from liars. Below is a list of a number of signals to watch for if you think someone may be lying. It’s not going to be completely possible to know every time someone lies, but there are definite signs that should send up a red flag.

Ericka told me about some of the pain caused by the lying of her ex-husband: I have two young children (3 & 1) and just left their father because he was addicted to gambling. I always thought that cheating would be the worst, but I soon discovered that along with gambling came lie after lie. Our relationship was never going to improve without trust. Discovering his lying earlier could possibly have saved Ericka and her children some needless pain. Would that be possible? I believe it is possible by figuring out how to know if someone is lying.

Lying is a stressful behavior, and it causes people to act differently when they lie.

We’ve all seen people take lie detector tests on TV or in the movies. It is an effective instrument, not because it can tell right from wrong, but because it can reveal when a person’s body is reacting in a stressful manner. Because lying is so wrong, it can cause stressful behavior, showing signs we can detect through body language.

It is important to learn to read body language. How does a person act in normal circumstances? Notice normal eye, hand and body movements, and facial expressions during regular conversation. Then you will better notice when the body language changes…showing the stress of lying.

One of the easiest and best ways to tell if someone is lying is by looking into their eyes. Most people who are lying have a difficult time holding eye contact with the person they’re lying to. Jenna agrees: It is hard to tell when people are lying to you. But in my case, I found that when someone is lying, they don’t give you eye contact.

8 More Signs Someone May Be Lying to You:

How to Catch a Liar:

  • A lying person may become tense and freeze up while telling the lie. Others may move their body way more than normal.
  • A lying person may appear uncomfortable fast eye blinking, scratching, itching, swallowing hard, fidgeting, etc.
  • A lying person may look up and to the right.
  • A lying person may touch their nose or cover up their face or mouth.
  • A lying person may often raise the pitch or speed of their voice.
  • A lying person may present a wide-eyed, innocent look.
  • A lying person may create noticeable pauses in the conversation as they are trying to come up with something to say that fits the lie they are creating.
  • A lying person often tells a different version of their original lie the second time around.

You’re not always going to be able to discover if a person is lying to you, but usually if it feels like a lie, it almost always is.

My desire is to help both those who lie and those who have been lied to. I care for you equally. So, it is my hope that if you are in the habit of lying you will stop and think twice. Know that your lies will ruin friendships and you will eventually get caught. And if you believe you are being lied to, trust your gut and confront the person you believe is being dishonest. It will be best for both of you in the long run.

Dawson McAllister
Dawson McAllister, also known as America's youth pastor, was an author, radio host, speaker, and founder of TheHopeLine. McAllister attended Bethel College in Minnesota for undergraduate work where he graduated in 1968, began graduate studies at Talbot School of Theology in California, and received an honorary doctorate from Biola University.
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50 comments on “Top Two Reasons You Should Stop Lying PLUS How Liars Get Caught”

  1. I've been lying for a long time because I feel like I am ugly and uninteresting. I am not a good person and I don't see how God can love me.

  2. I started lying about being pregnant after I lost my bf's second babies.The first one devistated me that we lost.So,when I lost the second which was twins I didnt want to believe it and started believing and lying to people that I was still pregnant.After being 9 months my bf's family brought it out in the open that
    I wasn't pregnant.I hurt alot of people.My mom,daughter and bf are still by my side.and I'm trying to do my best not to lie anymore.

  3. I'm only 13 and I've confirmed that I really, really have a bad habit of lying. My reason is to be accepted and be free of judgment. Honestly, I'm actually trying to stop but I can't.
    When I envy someone, I lie. When I'm jealous, I lie. When I'm in a sticky situation, I lie. Some friends of mine are actually turning against me, and they don't take me seriously because I've always told lies...please help me.

  4. I've been in a relationship for 12 years with this woman I love with all my heart. The lying has always been there and it has cost me my relationship with her and also cheating was part of it. When I had the chance to come clean and put it all on the table I couldn't do it. There is something inside me that holds me back from telling the truth and letting it go I can't figure out what it is that holds me back. The word trust is the biggest part of the relationship and once its damaged or gone you have a tuff road ahead trying to save your relationship with that one special person. I'm now challenging myself to stop lying and be honest with myself and tell the truth. I'm also seeking help for its not easy to do alone. The only way I can save my relationship if possible with this woman is to show her that I want to change and be the right kind of person she fell in love with and show her I'm not a lie and I can be honest. I want to build her trust back in me. The biggest thing is I don't want to be that kind of person known more for lying destroys who you are and makes you the wrong kind of person that know one wants to be around. I want to make Sharon proud of me and I want her to be able to trust me again. I will do this for me and also the love of my life. With gods help and lots of hard work I will over come this terrible addiction that has taken over my life. I've lied about things to her and other people and when she needed me to be there and stand up for her I wasn't. The prayers that I say to god in asking for him to help me get through this addiction will be answered one day. I will over come.

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