What to Know About Suicidal Ideation
What Is Suicidal Ideation?
Suicidal ideation is when you think about killing yourself. This could mean that someone is actively planning and considering suicide, or it could mean that someone is so overwhelmed that they just don’t want to go on. It’s estimated that about 9% of the general population experience suicidal thoughts, and around 5% of people between the ages of 18 and 25.
Those with health issues or other major life challenges are even more likely to deal with suicidal thoughts. Situational stressors like military service or being discriminated against can increase your risk of suicidal ideation, as can diagnoses of chronic pain, traumatic brain injury, substance abuse disorder, depression, bipolar disorder, and more.
Passive suicidal ideation is when a person wishes to be dead or hopes that it will happen soon but doesn’t make any plans to make it happen. This could look like crawling into bed for the night and hoping that you don’t wake up in the morning. This could look like thinking about how you wouldn’t have to face your problems if you were gone. It could also look like feeling so tired that you wish you could just “sleep forever.” Essentially, you may not necessarily want to die, but you do not want to live your life either.
Active suicidal ideation is when a person not only wants to die but fully intends to and may even already have plans for how to do it. While both are cause for concern and treatment, if you are having suicidal thoughts that include details about how you would commit the act, it’s important that you talk to someone ASAP. Please reach out to a Hope Coach today, or call 988 for support and 911 if you’re in immediate danger.
Do You Feel Suicidal Right Now?
I know life can be hard and problems can pile so high that we cannot see a way out. I want to give you some practical ideas to try when you are at the depth of despair and feeling overwhelmed and hopeless. When you feel suicidal, please try these four steps.
When you have lost hope and believe suicide is the only way out, please try these four ideas:
1. Reach Out for Help
I understand that finding the strength to do this can be really hard, especially if you also feel alone, but suicide prevention services are available to help.
- Chat with a Hope Coach
- Call or chat with the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 or www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
- Call your Contract for Life Partner or anyone who you trust...friend, pastor, parent, teacher, etc.
What Is a Contract for Life Partner?
Every person who is even remotely thinking of suicide, should have a Contract for Life partner. A Contract for Life partner is someone you trust and who understands you. This is someone you make a commitment to that says, I promise that if I have serious thoughts of killing myself, I will talk with you or with someone else I trust before I do anything destructive.
John is a survivor and here is his advice, "Don’t keep quiet if you are going to hurt yourself or others…please speak up. If you are feeling suicidal then talk to someone, don’t keep quiet about it. There is someone out there who will listen to you."
Keely said she has an older friend she calls when she feels suicidal thoughts coming on: I told her everything. And I told her that I need her help. Sometimes I just call to hear her voice to know I'm not alone. Other times, I ask if we can get together. She doesn't grill me, she's just there for me.
A Contract for Life partner is priceless because you can meet with them face to face or talk on the phone anytime. If you do not have one, please make it a priority to go looking for one today.
2. Refer to your Safety Plan
Take time right now to print out the Prevention Checklist and fill in the blanks of the Suicide Safety Plan. Then, whenever you have depression and suicidal thoughts, you can pull out your plan and follow what you have written down.
3. Remove whatever can harm you at that very moment
If there are guns, knives, and pills in your house, then RUN from your house. Get away from anything you can use to hurt yourself. This will buy you time to settle down and begin to think rationally. Some people are most suicidal when they are drunk.
Have someone you know, and trust clear all those things out of your house.
Wendelin said she was suicidal for over three years but was helped by knowing she wasn't alone: I had a friend who was there for me no matter what. I tried to push this friend away so many times, she took away the knives and scissors I'd cut with, my dad's diving knife, my grandpa's gun, and the hose and rope so I couldn't hang myself. Even though I was so mad at her for it, I knew she cared and that she really did love me.
Glory wrote: I tried a couple of times but it never really worked. Then one night I realized something. If you can't change it, get over it. There are much better things to do in life than sit around hating life. God gave us life so we should use it. Killing yourself is only running away from your problems. It won't help one bit.
4. Turn to other Activities
The key here is to get your mind off of doing the unthinkable. If you are near suicide, you want to change the subject, or divert your mind from what you were planning to do. Walk, jog, bike, swim, take a nap, take a hot shower, watch a movie, listen to music, read a book, do household chores, clean, go shopping, go to the park, volunteer at an animal shelter for a few hours – An excuse to play with puppies? Yes, please! Anything that has the potential to help you lift your spirit.
Kelsey discovered this worked for her: I actually went and got a knife to kill myself and I just stopped and I was thinking this really isn't solving my problems is it? So I just decided to try to get into something like hip-hop classes, get my mind off my life, and just try to live life to the fullest.
You were made for more.
I know it feels like life will never get better, but I believe that you can get to the other side of this pain. I believe you were created for more than what you are feeling right now. God designed you in His image. He breathed life into you. He KNOWS you and LOVES you and has a purpose for your life. It may not FEEL that way, but we can't always trust our feelings.
There is a man in the Bible who God says was a man after his heart. His name was David. Yet David struggled with his feelings a lot. Read the book of Psalms and you will see what I am talking about. For example, here is what King David said in Psalm 6:6-9, "All night I flood my bed with weeping, drenching it with my tears. My vision is blurred by grief; my eyes are worn out because of all my enemies. Go away, all you who do evil, for the Lord has heard my weeping. The Lord has heard my plea; the Lord will answer my prayer." Here are other Bible verses to encourage you - Verses of Hope when Struggling with Suicidal Thoughts
There are many more articles on TheHopeLine regarding suicide and we want you to know you are not alone. You matter, you are good enough and you are loved.
If you or a friend need support right now, chat on-line with a Hope Coach, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988, for free confidential, 24/7 help. Head here for a list of crisis centers around the world. For additional help, please visit the suicide prevention resource page.
ya help is bullshit, they either put you in drugs or charge you over 50$ an hour to speak with someone who will never understand you. Suicide IS the only way out, i've been thinking about suicide daily for the past 5 years, it doesn't get better, it never does, not when you're talentless, worthless, can't do everything everyone your age can and can't even open a bottle or jar because you have no physical upper body strength which means you can't do much else that you would need to to survive. for people like me, there is no other option but to wait till that survival instinct is completely numbed out and you can finally die in peace.
We are sorry you feel this way. You are not alone. You are worthy and your life is important. Never ever give up. If you need someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at http://chat.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/GetHelp/LifelineChat.aspx
I've been white knuckling my suicidal thoughts for years. Tried to get help many ways. I called the suicide Hotline and the guy actually yelled at me how it wasn't his problem! I would never call again. tried telling my mom more than once. Every time she asks me if I'm hearing voices...doesnt know the difference between clinical depression and other mental illness. I don't know if I'll make it. I feel like I live with a murderer and the murderer is me
Yep I was once hung up on by a suicide hotline- the guy said there were "more important things happening right now". Will never call again. I cannot save my child from horrific abuse and when his abuser finally kills him I will kill myself.
What suicide hotline did you call?
We recommend The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at http://chat.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/GetHelp/LifelineChat.aspx
I called the National Suicide Prevention hotline and was also told "why are you calling here? This isn't a counselling service? This is Detroit! And we have REAL emergencies" I had told her I'd been raped by my boyfriend. She said "It's not like you were dragged off the street by a stranger" and kind of laughed. When I tried calling the next night because I was suicidal still and desperate she hung up on me.
I was also tole many of them are not even volunteers but work at a medical place and are made to do it so many don't WANT to do it and find it annoying. You'll NEVER know what that feels like to be treated that way AFTER you have been raped and feel like dying. If I'd been better I would have complained but I was and still am too weak. I feel i was abused & belittled by this woman. So now if I feel that way at 2 am I am too afraid to call any crisis line.
We are so sorry you experienced this a the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. It's important that you are heard and that what you're going through is validated by who you are talking to. We are not a crisis line, but our HopeCoaches are available to listen to what you are going through. We do have a partner that may help you at Rainn.org. You may be familiar with them. They are a specific resource for sexual assault. This page on their site may be of some help https://www.rainn.org/after-sexual-assault. It is a crisis line and we understand your fear of calling one after the treatment you received. Please try to call Rainn's Crisis hotline at800.656.HOPE (4673) or chat online with one of their specialist at https://hotline.rainn.org/online/. We sincerely hope you find the help you need that listens and understands.
You need to get rid of the abuser and give one last worth of your life for the betterment of your kid.Even if it’s at a price.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nknzSWDcUgA
Hey, I just would like to say, you are a very beautiful, and an intelligent individual. You definitely are not alone when it comes to pointing out your flaws, because earnestly, I have a lot of them myself. Anyway you are very unique. Think about it like this, out of all of the billions of sperm that raced up that canal, to create life, because they wanted to live. Your's beat out all of the others. So, that in itself, makes you real unique. You're highly intelligent, and eventhough i don't know you, I do see it in your writing.
I feel the same
no it is not. there are people who want to hepl you.
Gracie, Are you still with us. I just wanted to know and hope you are. I am a veteran, I often have thoughts I cannot get rid of. I waited recently for my wife who was out of town to get home so I could tell her how I think about it more and more with much more intensity. When she got from visiting daughter and her mom, I was blamed for something I didn't do right off the bat. The therapy I hoped for only made things worse. I think of how many people have suffered because of me. I also had a tuff childhood at a young age. I do not remember everything, much actually, but have quick flashes now and then.
I am gonna fight against this. I have kids, and have experienced family member (uncle) committing suicide. He was not real close, but I wish I had done more.
I am tuffer than those who quit in life. I just will fight against these feelings. I believe satan is real now. I will not fall to this piece of crap.
I hope your still around, would love to hear back.
I’m in the same place. I will end it soon just don’t know how yet. I don’t care about life anymore but I do care about the people I am going to leave but what I care does not matter at this point. I hope you are well. Goodbye.
You still here Steve?
Im sorry your suffering..Ive suffered depression since young..i hid it well till my twenties..this went on to vertigo...cfs..fibromyalgia then arthritis now hypermobility and ddd...ive always been active..ive had five children all grown up now and employed...im 47 now and took my own life two years ago because i had been told repeatedly theres no cure for any of the diagnosis i have..i get suicidal thoughts often and its a challenge not to act on them..eventually after ive slowed down and struggled to fake happiness any longer..all friends dropped off.. i got so low i commited suicide..when i was found i was out of it for 4 days in hospital.. and then left with the embaressment of still being here. I have since been seeing a person centred therapist thinking this might help..it has a little bit...to know there someones there to vent to once a week but this can be fustrating when im okay on monday but have to talk about the crap way i feel over and over..its getting a bit much now and i got so desperate the other night i went on to a pain site for cfs/ME..who informed everybody with evidence based information that the goverment are responsible for the epedemic of depression.. autism..ME.cancer and the majority of diseases given to us through the compulsery immunisations they force us to have...and therapists cannot help as much as theyd like to because if this imformation is correct.. i have a chemical imbalance and disturbance that have been created through viruses put in our bodies through these immunisations that attack our nervous system and brain stem cells. This stops our brain from functioning affectivley....we have all been done to and there are ways to fight back..please check out hummingbird site for ME/cfs and the goverment cover up...i felt a bit gob smacked on reading it but i am also spreading the word..it might help..the site also gives advice on how to fight of the toxins put in our bodies..so this might help too..im not sure ive quite absobed it all or know where to go from here but any hope is better than no hope at all..i hope you find some comfort.
Doesn't matter if you have all the talent in the world either. I've spent the past 15 years trying to make up for the fact that my parents were abusive who kicked me out when I was still a child.
I had a 4.0 GPA in engineering, and was healthy enough to run a 6 minute mile, and was of slightly above average looks, and it meant nothing before the weight of the world. The better you do, the more people expect from you, and that never ends until you realize you have done nothing but be a servant to people who feel they are better than you regardless of your accomplishments.
Given just the medical costs of my diminished health, much of which was made worse by being homeless off and on so much since childhood (caused by a schizophrenic mother who talked to God, and decided I was guilty of several things I was not, which ended in punishments that frequently accounted for missing blood in my veins), life has been a struggle to even receive medical care.
What is messed up is we live in a world where we put sick dogs down, but we keep unhealthy, unloved humans around as if they were a pet to stroke our ego's with.
People wonder why mass homicide is up so high, this is it. We live in a world where people are figuring out exactly how hollow people are, after being told a bunch of absolute crap about how things will get better over and over again.
The only reason people will tell you to stay alive is they are selfish. No one wants to be the person who talked to you last before you suicide. It makes them feel responsible, and that is the truth of 'empathy' on this subject.
I completely understand where you're coming from on this...i'm middle aged (i mention this because ANOTHER annoyance is that most "help" for suicidal people is aimed at youth) & i have struggled with suicidal thoughts off & on a LONG time. I've had all of the following & nothing helps, no meds, no therapy, no advice or input from anyone helps. When i have a brief time of not feeling suicidal, it is so very temporary and soon replaced with the same old sh*t feelings. It is sad that so many of us feel this way....😕😔
Angel, I have those feelings too. They tried everything with me including ECT. I feel like if I could just be with a certain type of people and not know all the horrible things about the world I MIGHT be able to at least cope. But I'm surrounded by - a lot of people who hate me for unknown reasons or just say "It will get better. DON'T kill yourself. " but then they just leave me alone for weeks after I've told them I'm seriously suicidal. Sorry, that's not really what you were saying but I do know the awful hopeless gut wrenching feelings or worse numbness. Feeling a bit better soon makes me want to cry because then I realize how bad i feel most of the time.
You are not alone
Look, I'm scared. And, if I call the number for the prevention thing I'm afraid of them coming to my house. I keep feeling the urge to just, die.. Just to know what it's like to not feel anything. But I know it would only hurt my loved ones. T=At this point I'm willing to try anything to get out of whatever hell hole I have dug myself into.
-Emily
Emily, We are sending you an email with a resource to help you with what is going on. We know you're scared and we understand. It's important that you talk to someone about what is going on before you do anything that's permanent. You're life is valuable.
My names michael im 17 and i have a girlfriend and shes has my first son.she wont let me see him she says stuff all kinds of bad stuff to me.i i was diagnosed with depression
a year ago every time i see a pic of my son it breaks my heart that im not with him i just want to hug him kiss him. I just want to kill my self i cant take this anymore i cant
I'm in a bad situation at work; they fought to bring me on board, they wanted me so much (I'd worked with them before), but within 2 months, they were trying to fire me because of my disability ("working with you is a rollercoaster. I never know if you'll be able to come into the office or telework last-minute.") my boss sits me down for a cumulative 4 hours a week telling me I am disappointing him, that my schedule is "erratic" and I'm dishonest about my ability to work. I'm on short-term disability right now, but they'll be giving me a failing annual evaluation, meaning I will never be able to apply for any other government jobs again. HR assures me that they cannot retaliate for health reasons, so they have backed off of that, but they have decided to fire me over forget to CC important people on an email and not fixing it until 45 minutes later. I'm an at-will employee, so there's not much they can do. I've been an executive level communicator and have applied to over 30 jobs and can't get anyone else to consider me. My boss just found out I'm looking...
I've had to go on 3 heavy antidepressants and an anti-anxiety meds all since starting this job (I was on none before and did not have depression). I've begun cutting myself. I keep my scissors and razors in the kitchen, a shared space with my roommates.
My counselor of 5 years has not been able to give advice to help break through the crippling despair and feelings of worthlessness. I'm single in a religious culture (also LDS) that emphasizes family and feel rootless. I'm across the country from my family and we're not close; they all have their own nuclear families that they're caught up in. My roommates want me to move out because I'm soon to be laid off, I have racked up thousands of dollars in health bills and am soon to be laid off, and I can't date because of failing health. I pray and only feel bleakness. I speak to my bishop and he tells me God loves me and has a plan for me, but that doesn't help me in the short term. I'm scared, in pain, and alone without anyone in my corner to help me with these horrific odds.
I know these problems might be small in perspective, but I have no one to financially support me, have been denied for government disability, so I need to work and can't get another job to pay for the health care I need.
Melissa, You have been through much and understand your feelings of being overwhelmed by the financial challenges you are having and finding a job with your disability. We may not have all of the answers for you...we want you to know that you are worthy and valued and we are proud of your for reaching out to talk about what it going on. Please chat online with one of our HopeCoaches we have some resources that may help with your emotional support as you go through this season in your life. We want you to know you're not alone, and if you need help or support or someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or chat online with one of our HopeCoaches at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. We want you to know you're not alone, and if you need help or support or someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
I'm bad at what I do and it's driving me to harbour suicidal thoughts.