Answers to Tough Questions
I want to answer a couple of questions I've been asked recently about why girls sometimes dress provocatively and also about how guys sometimes brag about the girls they are with. Both are touchy subjects, but I hope that in the process of honestly answering these questions we will all learn what it means to relate to each other in a healthy way. I hope my answers will help give you more self-love and confidence.
Here was the first question from Michael:
"Why do girls dress so provocatively one minute, then complain that guys are superficial the next?"
This is a difficult question with many sides to it. One part of the answer is that some girls feel confident if they receive attention for the way they dress. It's nice to be noticed. Often girls even dress to impress other girls, maybe even more than guys. But for many girls it's even more important to fit in. Many young women feel it is social suicide to try to stick out in the crowd or wear something no one else is wearing. So, if all the girls are dressing in short skirts and low-cut shirts, they better do it as well, they think. Sometimes the styles may be more provocative than a girl feels comfortable wearing, but due to peer pressure, she will wear it anyway.
Some girls might not even realize that how they are dressing can affect guys. Don't get me wrong, some girls know exactly what they are doing, but some are just wearing what they think looks good. Since guys are sexually driven by what they see, it becomes easy for them to objectify women based on how they are dressed, but that doesn't make it right.
What Message Are You Sending?
So please know ladies that what you wear often sends a message...whether you intend it to or not. If you are flaunting your body, guys will be tempted to come after your body. However, if you advertise who you are on the inside, with such traits as kindness, gentleness, sensitivity, great personality, etc., they will be drawn to you for that.
Guys, it is important to realize most women want to be loved and respected for who they are on the inside. It's just the lies of the culture regarding how best to attract men confuses things. As a guy, when you compliment a girl, you have an opportunity to tell her she's beautiful, without expectations on what her response should be. Women often want to be thought of as beautiful, but they don't want to be disrespected. That's a fine line, but I believe it's possible for mature guys to walk that line.
The next question is also complicated, and it is from Tiana:
"Why do guys feel the need to brag about the girl they are with, and their sexual relationship with her?"
Unfortunately, some guys do like to talk to other guys about their sexual conquests. I think this often comes out of deep insecurity and a desire to impress other guys. It's a competition thing. If one guy has more success with women than others, his ranking in the group goes higher. That is why there is not only bragging, but exaggerating, and even downright lies about their experiences with women. When this happens, it shows a guy's immaturity and lack of respect for the opposite sex. These particular guys are working hard to develop a reputation as a macho guy. Watch out for these guys because they are more concerned about themselves than the girl they are with. Don't lose heart, there are good guys out there who don't behave in this way.
This kind of bragging is certainly not done to impress other women, as women are usually completely turned off by the idea of a guy talking about what he did with other women. Women respect a man more who can keep silent about what happens in private. Real manliness is when a guy fights to protect a women's reputation and feelings. Little boys like to exaggerate. Real men who are confident and secure don't have to brag to feel good about themselves.
It seems like the bad guys get all the good girls. Why does this happen? There are several different reasons for this to happen.
Very interesting stuff to read.
This article is a joke and sexist and a lie. I’ll keep it short, lotta long winded crap on here. Women are virtuous men are scandalous. That’s the message here…WRONG. As if there’s a cadre of chicks collaborating on what to wear then the lonely woman can’t resist based on popularity… what a joke. Men have this CONQUEST as a result of sex… haha. Men brag from insecurity and women dress for attraction. NO ONE is going to recognize a woman straight away for her personality. Sorry, the entire earth of mammals doesn’t work that way. Health and fitness to continue the species. It’s that simple.. the rest comes from pair bonding AFTER the fact. Then personality comes in. Get it right and don’t try to continue to degrade men making the next generation into losers that women don’t want anyway. Remember women are beauty objects and men are success objects. This is the ROOT of attraction in humans.
This article is not a joke. I want you to know that no one is a fool, not even men. We all have our challenges and struggles to face. The thing is that there are men out there who feel uncomfortable when they see women wearing over-revealing clothing. Just because a girl is a girl doesn't mean she can get away with everything. Men are NOT to blame. We all need to understand the consequences of our actions. To all you girls out there, don't wear too much revealing clothing because there are guys out there who are uncomfortable with that and we need to respect their feelings for that. Guys have feelings just like girls and do not deny me for saying that.
I also recognizes the lack of responsibility/ accountability rather to women. Everything was sugar coated, as if women don't make their own decisions and either society, peer pressure or (my favourite) Men are to blame. Like women are floating through life and things just happen to them. And also that men can't be down Like women and should be automatically well minded, so well in fact that they should not only take care of themselves but also women. But hey.
I'm satisfied No matter what with my girl, but honestly if you're not looking, you're a liar... Okay!! There are so many downright sexy hot ladies that are in such phenomenal shape these days, myself included.. Also my sidekick, which gets her share of men snapping their neck and sometimes, she tells me that it gets old, but it can also boost your confidence as a human being.••• But back to what I said, nowadays these younger girls, workout clothes, it's ridiculous, my neck is absolutely killing me, ☆hold on, ☆I'll be right there, she's calling me, my wife, so have a nice day all you 'Tigers'🤫😃👀
Come on guys! Stop taking sides, both you men and women! Acting childish and stupid. First of all it's not ok to objectify women, period! Men who dies these should be ashamed. Secondly to the author, you know what you did! We can see through your words we arent stupid. Empathy must be shown to men, they brag because they are insecure....they need help. So next time make sure you come right and support both sides, otherwise your article loses all respect immediately. Women suffered in the past yes, that should not be pushed aside. But the world is getting better. If we keep bringing up the past we might as well say all white people on this very thread are _____ and should be persecuted because of things their ancestors did. Exactly! my point. Move on, support both genders and work towards a better life.
You need some evolutionary psychology in your life, yes it’s not right but it’s intrinsic. To deny that is to deny human nature and embrace ignorance. By the same token it’s ignorant for women to dress revealing and then complain of the results. Walk out in leggings with a crop top and try to say it’s for comfort is ridiculous. Women know exactly what they are doing and any trying to deny are either way out of touch with reality or more likely in denial for selfish reasons.
Men need help. Wow. I am afraid for the next generation. Women suffered in the past? How so? Being taken care of, adored, sought after, beloved? Oh but wait, you mean like not being able to vote, forced to wear certain clothing (modesty to not attract other males), stoned for cheating (because women in general are not loyal, good deterrent), or the rare and random sicko that raped or kidnaps? How about the woman that gets drunk and regrets sleeping with someone she’s not attracted to, then claims rape? I would say the last point to be more common than not. I don’t hate women I’m happily married, but to blatantly make women out to be straight up victims is a joke.