Why Do People End Their Life by Suicide?

The very idea that someone wants to die is frightening. As a result, suicide is not an easy topic to discuss for many people. But suicide is preventable and talking about suicide does save lives. If one person can be saved from suicide by talking about it with someone, it is worth it; especially if that someone is you.

How to Handle Suicidal Thinking

Talking About Suicide Save Lives

I am amazed at the many powerful and wise comments I have received from you about suicide. I asked you to tell me why you think people contemplate suicide and you had some amazing insights. It is clear that it is usually not just one thing that compels someone to feel suicidal. You said it is a combination of a lot of things, including:

  • pain
  • loneliness
  • rejection
  • abuse
  • guilt
  • depression
  • helplessness
  • hopelessness

More than anything, I believe people who live with depression and suicidal thoughts feel hopeless. They are hurting so badly and want nothing more than for the pain to end. Unfortunately, they cannot imagine the pain ever going away. They cannot see the light at the end of the very dark and lonely tunnel they have found themselves traveling down. Have you ever felt this way?

Why Is Suicide So Common Among College Students?

For most students, college is a time of “firsts.” For the first time, you’re faced with living outside your parents’ home, managing your own schedule, deciding on an academic trajectory, working or taking out loans to pay for school, making new friends, getting to know a new environment, etc. Trying a new thing is always going to be a bit stressful, even if you’re excited about it. Trying a million new things all at once? Very stressful.

Without support, self-care, and a certain level of familiarity with mental health, times of transition and stress are very likely to impact us emotionally. College is a time when loneliness, hopelessness, depression, and anxiety have a lot of opportunities to take hold of you. On top of that, the typical age range of a college student (18-24) is a time when many mental illnesses manifest in patients. Whether you’re in college or not, these years are when your brain may develop symptoms of anxiety, depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, etc.

Between the stage of brain development that most college students are in, and the stress level they’re experiencing in a time of high expectations and constant change, it’s no surprise that suicide rates are especially high within this particular population.

So what can you do about it? If you or someone you know is headed to college, get on the school’s official website and explore what kinds of resources they offer for mental health. Most campuses have health centers to support their students’ needs, and many of those now offer services like counseling or support groups that are free for students. Get familiar with that resource so that if you need it, you can use it! And even though college is a busy time, make sure that caring for yourself is a top priority. Adequate sleep, nutritious food, exercise, other types of rest, and social support are all crucial elements of a healthy college experience.

Don't Believe the Lies...You Matter

It is not uncommon for a person’s circumstances or their self-image to cause someone to think negatively about themselves.

Oftentimes, people consider suicide because they are unable to find any reason to make living worthwhile. They think their problems are unsolvable and they feel completely out of control. I believe first and foremost; hopelessness is a serious spiritual problem rooted in lies and faulty thinking. Anytime you believe lies that depression and suicidal thoughts tell you about yourself, you are listening to the wrong voices.

Jennifer said suicide has been a daily struggle for the past nine years due to being sexually abused. "I feel like suicide is the only option I have left, the only chance at peace I'll ever have. I just want the pain to stop. It's as if something will always be missing and life will never be quite right." There is no denying that the pain of sexual abuse can be tremendous. But the abuse is not Jennifer’s fault. She needs to find the hope that she can overcome this pain. Many people just like Jennifer have overcome abuse by talking about it with a professional counselor. She needs to learn how to stop punishing herself for her abuser’s actions.

Reach Out to Talk About the Pain...Never Give Up

Have you ever gone through something so painful you were convinced the pain was never going to go away? Many people who contemplate suicide say something like: I don't want to die. I just want the pain to stop. They think, "Because I’m in intense pain today, I will always be in pain." It is this kind of faulty thinking that can lead people down the path that leads to suicide.

Kas wrote: I think about suicide pretty much every second of the day. It seems like it's my only choice anymore. I know it's not the answer, but at times I just feel like I can't move on with this life anymore.

Substance Abuse Magnifies Suicidal Thoughts and Behaviors

If you are already living with suicidal ideation, it is important to remember that substance abuse only works to magnify these thoughts and behaviors. Alcohol makes depression worse, impairs thinking and judgment, and increases impulsivity. There is no safety without sobriety. Additionally, coping skills like alcohol, drugs, and self-harm, all fail – because they never address the actual root of the pain. They only serve to temporarily cover it up.

Jordyn wrote: Some people have suicidal thoughts because they want to escape the isolation, pain, and rejection from the environment surrounding them. Others simply feel they have reached a state of loneliness and depression in their lives to the point where their thoughts become so negative, that they can't find any other reason to live. They would rather not confront it because of the fear of hurt that comes along with it. I feel that when you go through times of depression and think about suicide, God is there by your side. He will not abandon you. It is only a matter of whether you reach out to Him through prayer that you will be free from these thoughts.

Mandy also wrote: "Part of the very reason people do what they do is because they have failed. Suicide is the result of irrational thinking in the illness of DEPRESSION. And when people reach that level, just as my father did on the 18th of January 2020, it was a reminder that even the strong fall... "

Depression is a real illness and needs real meaningful help. If you're thinking, "I just want the pain to stop", let us help you. To learn more about depression, please read this guest blog from our partner, Centerstone.

TheHopeLine Team
For over 30 years, TheHopeLine has been helping students and young adults in crisis. Our team is made up of writers and mental health professionals who care deeply about helping others.
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443 comments on “Why Do People End Their Life by Suicide?”

  1. My daughter's fiance hung himself with a belt 9 days ago. My daughter found him. For the last year he has been a bigger part of our family than his own. I had no clue he was suicidal, yes, I know there were signs of depression, but my daughter denied it. Shortly after his death, she opened up to me about some of his demons. She never thought he would do what he did. Unfortunately, he did do it.
    My reason for being here is that, his family has now come in and demanded that she give up everything of his including their money that they shared together. They didn't have much and never did. Now, that there isn't anything, they are accusing her of stealing and lying. There was nothing and I know this, but they won't listen. She was the only one there for him for the last year and now she is treated like dirt. I have realized that this young man had warning signs for many years. Is the family just hurting and grieving in their own way?

  2. I tried to kill myself last week. It wasn't a cry for help. I really really just wanted to end my hurt and pain. If the pills hadn't been taken away from me, I would have continued to down the entire bottle of my meds. I have a doctor's appointment today; I am grateful that I wasn't admitted and that I was released to my family. I was abused as a child by a family member resulting in classic text book/cliched life choices...pregnancy as a teenager, drug use, etc. I overcame it by succeeding in life - college educated with a good job and a good husband, yet, I am unhappy and feel unworthy of love. It is very hard to not loathe yourself even when you yourself are a victim. I am 37 and wish that I could be happy. I don't see how that is a possibility when all you can think of yourself is as a pig who is not worthy of love.

    1. I understand your pain. I feel the same way. But you are worthy of love! Love yourself! Treat yourself life a queen! You are not a pig! If you are curvy, then love your curves. Be All About That Bass! No treble! Screw what other losers think. People treat you bad because they hate themselves and to make you feel pain alleviates theirs. Don't be their punching bag any longer. Be strong and fight back!... Be a good person, do right, treat yourself to things you like, meditate, do yoga, go for walks even if you don't feel like it. Put music on that makes you feel good and walk it out! Live for YOURSELF, no one else. There is still time to do what YOU want to do with your life! There are a lot of jerks in this world. You are above that! You are beautiful, worthy and GOOD!!! Take care of yourself, you deserve it!

  3. I have suffering from severe depression from the last 8 years.I just don't know how to overcome this depression...I've been always thinking about committing suicide but I am still alive today..but i may really do it if it's not going away..life is hopeless.I've tried a thousand times to defeat this feeling but i can't..I can't enjoy this life anymore...maybe it is better not to live anymore

      1. Yes, i have had thoughts of suicide but im better now. I also had a friend kill himself and i hurt inside to understand but i know i need to stay and become a better person to see,feel,live,to know that life can't beat me down. I truly feel for everyone who feels that they can't live. I understand that so so much. If anyone wants to just talk im here,i can be there for you. I have been through a lot in my life of only be 40 but i truly want to be there for another person that feels so low,and i care about people and love God to be able to let me live. I encourage any one to get help ,to talk to live stonger.

        1. Hi I know this was 5 days ago. I've never gone online to talk about these things. I usually read everyone's replys n stories for hope. You said if anyone wants to talk so here I am. Help please.

          1. Depression is cause for an imbalance of brain cells your doctor can prescribe a medicine BUT he needs to know every detailed of how you feel or if you see shadows every thin so hi can help u . you are going to be ok. do not give up the gift of living your life.

  4. I wanted to die since I was 9 im now 17. i have tried multiple things to take my life.i drank a mixture of cleaning supplies,i tried strangling myself with a belt I tried suffocating myself I even took pills. I cut my wrist open about a year ago. I still have thoughts I have to injure myself to distract myself. I feel if im gone their wont be any worries.i wont be anyones exscape goat when there mad. I just want it all to end. I want to stop being angry I want to stop feeling like nothing. I want to finally be at peace. I wanted to be at peace today but I read this idk y I got her something inside told me to I guess. so thank you for now

    1. i have a question do you have friends, brothers of sisters, parents, coworkers? If you do then I feel the need to tell you to think about them, how they hearts will break, some light will leave their eyes, they will be left with a giant gaping hole that you left there. People you never meet will feel horrible and stay up at night and wonder "If I just knew them, maybe I could help them." Because let me tell you a eternity of nothing is a whole lot worse than a life of feeling. Live for the shows you're going to watch live for the books you are going to read, live for the people you love but most of all, LIVE FOR YOURSELF because you matter.

  5. my mom..is about to kill herself , I don't know how to stop her..I'm only 16 years old..
    I Don't have a dad , I don't have grandparents..
    my mom is an Aquarius and a very depressed one..
    I'm a Taurus and me and my mom NEVER get along...
    but now she is giving me all of her stuff...I just don't know what to do without her..
    :'(

    1. I think maybe you will show her how much she means to you and tell her that without her you can't live maybe she will think that se is the reason that you are alive so she will never hurt her self because she will know that she will hurt you too

    2. you need to tell her how you feel about her and tell an adult but please know its not your fault she loves you

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