The very idea that someone wants to die is frightening. As a result, suicide is not an easy topic to discuss for many people. But suicide is preventable and talking about suicide does save lives. If one person can be saved from suicide by talking about it with someone, it is worth it; especially if that someone is you.
How to Handle Suicidal Thinking
Talking About Suicide Save Lives
I am amazed at the many powerful and wise comments I have received from you about suicide. I asked you to tell me why you think people contemplate suicide and you had some amazing insights. It is clear that it is usually not just one thing that compels someone to feel suicidal. You said it is a combination of a lot of things, including:
- pain
- loneliness
- rejection
- abuse
- guilt
- depression
- helplessness
- hopelessness
More than anything, I believe people who live with depression and suicidal thoughts feel hopeless. They are hurting so badly and want nothing more than for the pain to end. Unfortunately, they cannot imagine the pain ever going away. They cannot see the light at the end of the very dark and lonely tunnel they have found themselves traveling down. Have you ever felt this way?
Why Is Suicide So Common Among College Students?
For most students, college is a time of “firsts.” For the first time, you’re faced with living outside your parents’ home, managing your own schedule, deciding on an academic trajectory, working or taking out loans to pay for school, making new friends, getting to know a new environment, etc. Trying a new thing is always going to be a bit stressful, even if you’re excited about it. Trying a million new things all at once? Very stressful.
Without support, self-care, and a certain level of familiarity with mental health, times of transition and stress are very likely to impact us emotionally. College is a time when loneliness, hopelessness, depression, and anxiety have a lot of opportunities to take hold of you. On top of that, the typical age range of a college student (18-24) is a time when many mental illnesses manifest in patients. Whether you’re in college or not, these years are when your brain may develop symptoms of anxiety, depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, etc.
Between the stage of brain development that most college students are in, and the stress level they’re experiencing in a time of high expectations and constant change, it’s no surprise that suicide rates are especially high within this particular population.
So what can you do about it? If you or someone you know is headed to college, get on the school’s official website and explore what kinds of resources they offer for mental health. Most campuses have health centers to support their students’ needs, and many of those now offer services like counseling or support groups that are free for students. Get familiar with that resource so that if you need it, you can use it! And even though college is a busy time, make sure that caring for yourself is a top priority. Adequate sleep, nutritious food, exercise, other types of rest, and social support are all crucial elements of a healthy college experience.
Don't Believe the Lies...You Matter
It is not uncommon for a person’s circumstances or their self-image to cause someone to think negatively about themselves.
Oftentimes, people consider suicide because they are unable to find any reason to make living worthwhile. They think their problems are unsolvable and they feel completely out of control. I believe first and foremost; hopelessness is a serious spiritual problem rooted in lies and faulty thinking. Anytime you believe lies that depression and suicidal thoughts tell you about yourself, you are listening to the wrong voices.
Jennifer said suicide has been a daily struggle for the past nine years due to being sexually abused. "I feel like suicide is the only option I have left, the only chance at peace I'll ever have. I just want the pain to stop. It's as if something will always be missing and life will never be quite right." There is no denying that the pain of sexual abuse can be tremendous. But the abuse is not Jennifer’s fault. She needs to find the hope that she can overcome this pain. Many people just like Jennifer have overcome abuse by talking about it with a professional counselor. She needs to learn how to stop punishing herself for her abuser’s actions.
Reach Out to Talk About the Pain...Never Give Up
Have you ever gone through something so painful you were convinced the pain was never going to go away? Many people who contemplate suicide say something like: I don't want to die. I just want the pain to stop. They think, "Because I’m in intense pain today, I will always be in pain." It is this kind of faulty thinking that can lead people down the path that leads to suicide.
Kas wrote: I think about suicide pretty much every second of the day. It seems like it's my only choice anymore. I know it's not the answer, but at times I just feel like I can't move on with this life anymore.
Substance Abuse Magnifies Suicidal Thoughts and Behaviors
If you are already living with suicidal ideation, it is important to remember that substance abuse only works to magnify these thoughts and behaviors. Alcohol makes depression worse, impairs thinking and judgment, and increases impulsivity. There is no safety without sobriety. Additionally, coping skills like alcohol, drugs, and self-harm, all fail – because they never address the actual root of the pain. They only serve to temporarily cover it up.
Jordyn wrote: Some people have suicidal thoughts because they want to escape the isolation, pain, and rejection from the environment surrounding them. Others simply feel they have reached a state of loneliness and depression in their lives to the point where their thoughts become so negative, that they can't find any other reason to live. They would rather not confront it because of the fear of hurt that comes along with it. I feel that when you go through times of depression and think about suicide, God is there by your side. He will not abandon you. It is only a matter of whether you reach out to Him through prayer that you will be free from these thoughts.
Mandy also wrote: "Part of the very reason people do what they do is because they have failed. Suicide is the result of irrational thinking in the illness of DEPRESSION. And when people reach that level, just as my father did on the 18th of January 2020, it was a reminder that even the strong fall... "
Depression is a real illness and needs real meaningful help. If you're thinking, "I just want the pain to stop", let us help you. To learn more about depression, please read this guest blog from our partner, Centerstone.
I'm 50 now. Had anxiety and depression probably since I was young, though back then I was called excitable and emotional. It seems calling people who feel like me emo is still a a fun, cruel thing.
So many people are cruel naturally or ignorant and selfish. I'm not talking about suicidal people. Telling suicidal people what to do doesn't help them. But kind words and actions and being there makes all the difference.
50 years on I'm tired of talking so much. Less people listen. Less help. They get tired and I've already been tired so long. I wish God would take me from this world to him. Unfortunately I don't think it works that way. Does depression and waiting to die work for him either though?
I have no one that really relies on me.For so long I've gone in circles. No human has any right to attack me. If you can't be compassionate and mindful you are part of the problem.
i want to kill myself. my husband never wants to communicate with me unless hes being mean. its the worst when we go out and he treats me like a stray dog. he will talk to everyone but me and just leave me sitting by myself.he smiles and flirts with other women right in front of me as well. he has said the cruelest things to me in the last 12 years. also I found a LOT of pictures of another woman on his phone,it wasn't anyone he knows, but a news personality on one of the big networks, but it still hurt, I mean I used to be pretty but now I'm so repulsive he doesn't even want to look at me. I also found porn, and when I asked him about it, he said, "the female body is a beautiful thing". mind you, he never wants to share intimacy with me very often(not for lack of trying on my part). when we do get intimate he says its because he needs the release, and i feel like a blow up doll, seriously.we also have a lot of financial problems. also I suffer from chronic migraine.we have 4 kids, and although they are whats keeping me alive, I also feel that they would be better off without a loser mother like me. I have very little support from my family of origin, and my friends are all busy and I hate to bother them. I forgot he said he looked at that news lady so much because shes not only beautiful but smart and accomplished, she's done something with her life. I just feel so useless after all of this. I really feel stuck and like nothing will ever get better, in fact it all just gets worse
Your children need you. No one else will love them the way you do because you are their mother. I am sad for you that your marriage is in a bad place emotionally and physically. Don't let that rob you of the joy of being a mom of four great kids. His actions have nothing to do with you and everything to do with his own issues and addictions. This is a really helpful free eBook about porn addiction and how it affects intimacy and relationships - http://info.thehopeline.com/porn-addiction
Please know that he is the one with the problem, not you.
I am going to do it today. I'm just so tired of not being good enough.
Been in many relationships and it's been 1 heart ache after another and another I can't have children of my own I'm divorced my credit got all messed up cuz my ex spent more than I can afford I've always struggled with depression and the feeling of being alone my current gf says she loves me but she isn't IN LOVE with me she has a son but doesn't want me even as a step father, I kno I'll never have a family of my own so what's the ppint to continue to live if you have nothing or nobody to live for?
Hi. I'm Emily I sometimes I feel like committing suicide because if I'm not being rejected I am being abused I tried cutting my veins but I didn't succeed because I am very scary and I hate to see blood and I know if I kill my self many people will be sad I want to live my life until God his self show me that it is time to died and I have my things I'd like to do. So i asked my self why should I die then again I asked why live but looking at the comments u guys saved me from suicide.
Thanks for leaving me with a life 🙂
I am so thankful you found our website! And I am so very glad that you are here. I am sure that God has a very special plan for your life. You are precious to God and to us.