The very idea that someone wants to die is frightening. As a result, suicide is not an easy topic to discuss for many people. But suicide is preventable and talking about suicide does save lives. If one person can be saved from suicide by talking about it with someone, it is worth it; especially if that someone is you.
How to Handle Suicidal Thinking
Talking About Suicide Save Lives
I am amazed at the many powerful and wise comments I have received from you about suicide. I asked you to tell me why you think people contemplate suicide and you had some amazing insights. It is clear that it is usually not just one thing that compels someone to feel suicidal. You said it is a combination of a lot of things, including:
- pain
- loneliness
- rejection
- abuse
- guilt
- depression
- helplessness
- hopelessness
More than anything, I believe people who live with depression and suicidal thoughts feel hopeless. They are hurting so badly and want nothing more than for the pain to end. Unfortunately, they cannot imagine the pain ever going away. They cannot see the light at the end of the very dark and lonely tunnel they have found themselves traveling down. Have you ever felt this way?
Why Is Suicide So Common Among College Students?
For most students, college is a time of “firsts.” For the first time, you’re faced with living outside your parents’ home, managing your own schedule, deciding on an academic trajectory, working or taking out loans to pay for school, making new friends, getting to know a new environment, etc. Trying a new thing is always going to be a bit stressful, even if you’re excited about it. Trying a million new things all at once? Very stressful.
Without support, self-care, and a certain level of familiarity with mental health, times of transition and stress are very likely to impact us emotionally. College is a time when loneliness, hopelessness, depression, and anxiety have a lot of opportunities to take hold of you. On top of that, the typical age range of a college student (18-24) is a time when many mental illnesses manifest in patients. Whether you’re in college or not, these years are when your brain may develop symptoms of anxiety, depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, etc.
Between the stage of brain development that most college students are in, and the stress level they’re experiencing in a time of high expectations and constant change, it’s no surprise that suicide rates are especially high within this particular population.
So what can you do about it? If you or someone you know is headed to college, get on the school’s official website and explore what kinds of resources they offer for mental health. Most campuses have health centers to support their students’ needs, and many of those now offer services like counseling or support groups that are free for students. Get familiar with that resource so that if you need it, you can use it! And even though college is a busy time, make sure that caring for yourself is a top priority. Adequate sleep, nutritious food, exercise, other types of rest, and social support are all crucial elements of a healthy college experience.
Don't Believe the Lies...You Matter
It is not uncommon for a person’s circumstances or their self-image to cause someone to think negatively about themselves.
Oftentimes, people consider suicide because they are unable to find any reason to make living worthwhile. They think their problems are unsolvable and they feel completely out of control. I believe first and foremost; hopelessness is a serious spiritual problem rooted in lies and faulty thinking. Anytime you believe lies that depression and suicidal thoughts tell you about yourself, you are listening to the wrong voices.
Jennifer said suicide has been a daily struggle for the past nine years due to being sexually abused. "I feel like suicide is the only option I have left, the only chance at peace I'll ever have. I just want the pain to stop. It's as if something will always be missing and life will never be quite right." There is no denying that the pain of sexual abuse can be tremendous. But the abuse is not Jennifer’s fault. She needs to find the hope that she can overcome this pain. Many people just like Jennifer have overcome abuse by talking about it with a professional counselor. She needs to learn how to stop punishing herself for her abuser’s actions.
Reach Out to Talk About the Pain...Never Give Up
Have you ever gone through something so painful you were convinced the pain was never going to go away? Many people who contemplate suicide say something like: I don't want to die. I just want the pain to stop. They think, "Because I’m in intense pain today, I will always be in pain." It is this kind of faulty thinking that can lead people down the path that leads to suicide.
Kas wrote: I think about suicide pretty much every second of the day. It seems like it's my only choice anymore. I know it's not the answer, but at times I just feel like I can't move on with this life anymore.
Substance Abuse Magnifies Suicidal Thoughts and Behaviors
If you are already living with suicidal ideation, it is important to remember that substance abuse only works to magnify these thoughts and behaviors. Alcohol makes depression worse, impairs thinking and judgment, and increases impulsivity. There is no safety without sobriety. Additionally, coping skills like alcohol, drugs, and self-harm, all fail – because they never address the actual root of the pain. They only serve to temporarily cover it up.
Jordyn wrote: Some people have suicidal thoughts because they want to escape the isolation, pain, and rejection from the environment surrounding them. Others simply feel they have reached a state of loneliness and depression in their lives to the point where their thoughts become so negative, that they can't find any other reason to live. They would rather not confront it because of the fear of hurt that comes along with it. I feel that when you go through times of depression and think about suicide, God is there by your side. He will not abandon you. It is only a matter of whether you reach out to Him through prayer that you will be free from these thoughts.
Mandy also wrote: "Part of the very reason people do what they do is because they have failed. Suicide is the result of irrational thinking in the illness of DEPRESSION. And when people reach that level, just as my father did on the 18th of January 2020, it was a reminder that even the strong fall... "
Depression is a real illness and needs real meaningful help. If you're thinking, "I just want the pain to stop", let us help you. To learn more about depression, please read this guest blog from our partner, Centerstone.
I am 36, recently learned that I am on the autism spectrum. I grew up in virtual isolation; I went to school and was forced to go to church weekly hence virtual. The household that I grew up in was ripe with abuse, constant fighting and a father who suffered diagnosed "depression". We weren't allowed to have friends. The ASD diagnosis explains much, the daily personal routine of walking the boundary of the schoolyard during recess, standing alone by a garbage can, sitting alone on the school bus, and not fully understanding things around me, etc. And yes, I was bullied. Being bullied perhaps made me hyper-aware of myself and my actions to a point that I forced my brain into hyperdrive to manage and "hide myself". There's only a limited amount of people who would understand it when I say that I "woke up" within the past few years after suicide ideation since I was about 16. I was moderately successful but now on disability, barely able to function. And due to the isolation, making friends or family simply isn't readily available. It amazes me how quick "friends" flee when you tell them that you're on disability and suicidal save for one really good friend one who I don't know how long I can depend on as I know the strain I put on her. I don't have anyone else. I do what I can as difficult as it is. The only thing I have is disability benefits for as long as they hold.
When I went on disability my brain was as I can describe it now, beyond fatigued due to my constant overdrive state. I struggle now with basic tasks and sleep a lot. Looking ahead at 30ish more years of dealing with my life isn't overly appealing. And looking at the writings on the wall of my parents, my future is bleak; I've figured out and learned that from my personal self-realization that likely both of my parents had/has some form of ASD, my father very likely. My mother I believe either it is asd but possibly mild schizophrenia. These statements come with years and years of trying to figure out the why's. And to add insult, my grandfather on my mother's side at the very least had electroconvulsive therapy in its more earlier form.
Alongside my ASD, one of the symptoms is aversion to people. I get tired easily. The world doesn't seem real, it is like watching the world through a lense/television. I live in a glass shell where I cope best if I pretend no one sees me. I don't leave my house much with exception of going to my friends house. And I get, as I describe, disoriented when trying to do stuff that takes a lot of hand-eye- coordination, this includes walking in the backyard and even gardening. When i go outside I feel like everyone is watching me; I am hyper-aware. This has always been the case, I've only become aware of it.
People talk about "getting help" and so on. Its great if help exists to combat ones mental disease/illness but the reality is that mental illness cannot be cured and help is oftentimes limited.
At least I can say that I stuck around long enough to figure myself out and the reasoning for the living conditions growing up (not that it makes much difference). I grew up in a world unique to its own. And I still live in a world unique to its own. But I really do want it to end.
My viewpoint is somewhat different. I have a long-term health condition that prevents me being able to work. In the UK you are treated with suspicion by the powers that be if you apply for benefits. You are thought to be either a criminal, a liar, or at best a whinger. You are dependant for your continued existence on people who treat you with the utmost contempt. My question is, if you are unable to work, should you commit suicide? What I mean is, would that be the right thing to do - the laudable thing? It is often called 'the coward's way out', and yet living on charity handouts is hardly any better. Do you see? It does seem to make more sense, since you aren't contributing to society anymore, to remove yourself from it.
Hi, I live I. Washington state with my son in law and daughter. We rent in a hoaxers house, he is digusting and verbally abusive. My son in law is out of work from construction, and my daughter will be whatever she can not to. He gets paid weekly and they make enough money to move on if they wish, but the landlord makes it cheep for then. She 3 of us do some stuff together but mostly just the 3 of them, they even leave there dog with me all the time. I have been alone except for my baby dog. And I do not make enough mo eye to get even low housing. I can't afford to drive a car. My eyes are bad, I broke the upper front tooth in the front. Hav
D one made and accidentally threw it W away. $900 I don't have. My joints are all degenerating and my weight is climbing , I Have put on40 lbs this year alone ..I am technicall married, are wedding was in Sept 2005, we separated in 2010, back together then week before he left took the the dogs, etc, he had already bought a house, he had left us n a trailer I couldn't afford. Si cue then I have turned 61, no one looks at me, I swear I might just as well be invisible. I hang on for my service dog, and she is 11 and si k, and when she goes I go, unless my life changes. Thank you for listening
Does anyone believe if you commit suicide will God send you to hell?? I have borderline personality disorder, and can't cope with it anymore.
I honestly dont think so. I think there might be some form of "punishment" per se based on the many different religious viewpoints I have studied, but certainly nothing eternal. To me that flies in the face of any of the reasons why we experience life on earth. Regardless, I hope you do not go through with it. I believe you can get through it. Best wishes.
how can a doctor or any professional help provide the love that one lost???????????????????????????????????????