The very idea that someone wants to die is frightening. As a result, suicide is not an easy topic to discuss for many people. But suicide is preventable and talking about suicide does save lives. If one person can be saved from suicide by talking about it with someone, it is worth it; especially if that someone is you.
How to Handle Suicidal Thinking
Talking About Suicide Save Lives
I am amazed at the many powerful and wise comments I have received from you about suicide. I asked you to tell me why you think people contemplate suicide and you had some amazing insights. It is clear that it is usually not just one thing that compels someone to feel suicidal. You said it is a combination of a lot of things, including:
- pain
- loneliness
- rejection
- abuse
- guilt
- depression
- helplessness
- hopelessness
More than anything, I believe people who live with depression and suicidal thoughts feel hopeless. They are hurting so badly and want nothing more than for the pain to end. Unfortunately, they cannot imagine the pain ever going away. They cannot see the light at the end of the very dark and lonely tunnel they have found themselves traveling down. Have you ever felt this way?
Why Is Suicide So Common Among College Students?
For most students, college is a time of “firsts.” For the first time, you’re faced with living outside your parents’ home, managing your own schedule, deciding on an academic trajectory, working or taking out loans to pay for school, making new friends, getting to know a new environment, etc. Trying a new thing is always going to be a bit stressful, even if you’re excited about it. Trying a million new things all at once? Very stressful.
Without support, self-care, and a certain level of familiarity with mental health, times of transition and stress are very likely to impact us emotionally. College is a time when loneliness, hopelessness, depression, and anxiety have a lot of opportunities to take hold of you. On top of that, the typical age range of a college student (18-24) is a time when many mental illnesses manifest in patients. Whether you’re in college or not, these years are when your brain may develop symptoms of anxiety, depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, etc.
Between the stage of brain development that most college students are in, and the stress level they’re experiencing in a time of high expectations and constant change, it’s no surprise that suicide rates are especially high within this particular population.
So what can you do about it? If you or someone you know is headed to college, get on the school’s official website and explore what kinds of resources they offer for mental health. Most campuses have health centers to support their students’ needs, and many of those now offer services like counseling or support groups that are free for students. Get familiar with that resource so that if you need it, you can use it! And even though college is a busy time, make sure that caring for yourself is a top priority. Adequate sleep, nutritious food, exercise, other types of rest, and social support are all crucial elements of a healthy college experience.
Don't Believe the Lies...You Matter
It is not uncommon for a person’s circumstances or their self-image to cause someone to think negatively about themselves.
Oftentimes, people consider suicide because they are unable to find any reason to make living worthwhile. They think their problems are unsolvable and they feel completely out of control. I believe first and foremost; hopelessness is a serious spiritual problem rooted in lies and faulty thinking. Anytime you believe lies that depression and suicidal thoughts tell you about yourself, you are listening to the wrong voices.
Jennifer said suicide has been a daily struggle for the past nine years due to being sexually abused. "I feel like suicide is the only option I have left, the only chance at peace I'll ever have. I just want the pain to stop. It's as if something will always be missing and life will never be quite right." There is no denying that the pain of sexual abuse can be tremendous. But the abuse is not Jennifer’s fault. She needs to find the hope that she can overcome this pain. Many people just like Jennifer have overcome abuse by talking about it with a professional counselor. She needs to learn how to stop punishing herself for her abuser’s actions.
Reach Out to Talk About the Pain...Never Give Up
Have you ever gone through something so painful you were convinced the pain was never going to go away? Many people who contemplate suicide say something like: I don't want to die. I just want the pain to stop. They think, "Because I’m in intense pain today, I will always be in pain." It is this kind of faulty thinking that can lead people down the path that leads to suicide.
Kas wrote: I think about suicide pretty much every second of the day. It seems like it's my only choice anymore. I know it's not the answer, but at times I just feel like I can't move on with this life anymore.
Substance Abuse Magnifies Suicidal Thoughts and Behaviors
If you are already living with suicidal ideation, it is important to remember that substance abuse only works to magnify these thoughts and behaviors. Alcohol makes depression worse, impairs thinking and judgment, and increases impulsivity. There is no safety without sobriety. Additionally, coping skills like alcohol, drugs, and self-harm, all fail – because they never address the actual root of the pain. They only serve to temporarily cover it up.
Jordyn wrote: Some people have suicidal thoughts because they want to escape the isolation, pain, and rejection from the environment surrounding them. Others simply feel they have reached a state of loneliness and depression in their lives to the point where their thoughts become so negative, that they can't find any other reason to live. They would rather not confront it because of the fear of hurt that comes along with it. I feel that when you go through times of depression and think about suicide, God is there by your side. He will not abandon you. It is only a matter of whether you reach out to Him through prayer that you will be free from these thoughts.
Mandy also wrote: "Part of the very reason people do what they do is because they have failed. Suicide is the result of irrational thinking in the illness of DEPRESSION. And when people reach that level, just as my father did on the 18th of January 2020, it was a reminder that even the strong fall... "
Depression is a real illness and needs real meaningful help. If you're thinking, "I just want the pain to stop", let us help you. To learn more about depression, please read this guest blog from our partner, Centerstone.
i m 36 yrs old man. i attend my life's last exam 4 railway job becouse my all efford hv vanised. but main reason 4 dipration is that some peoples around me they think themself richman they disturbing me.
Nitya, Please never give up. You are valuable and worthy! We have some resources we can give you to help you with these thoughts. We have a partner that you can help you through this. If you email us at thehopeline.team@thehopeline.com we can give you a private number to call for help. If you need someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/. You can reach the Crisis Text Line 24/7 by texting “START” to 741-741 too.
Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources.
All I do is cause pain, humiliation & embarrassment for others, for myself I cause confusion, because I want to be dead, tho I don't want to hurt my kids, still I want to be dead, I love my kids yet in their eyes & their mothers I'm always wrong, even with an obvious I'm wrong always, this causes such a horrible pain in my inside I already feel dead, & if I do finally succeed ending my life I'm sure their memories of me won't change, I'll still be that dad that no matter how much & how many good things I have done the only thing that will matter is I failed. Yes, I'm a failure, after my ex decided to throw away 21 yrs of marriage & even tho she definitely did her share to aid in this removal of me from our family it still was all pinned on me . Kids knew of her wrong doings yet she was golden & I was shit. I don't just want to be dead, I need it now, for me & even if it hurts them I need to do it for them also, I'm no good for anyone.
Curtis, It's hard to see it right now. You are grieving your family and a 21 year marriage. You are valuable and worthy! You feel like a failure, but your kids still need you! Don't give up on yourself or them. Show them how strong you are and stay with us. Don't miss out on a life that can and will get better. It's good you are reaching out to talk about this. We have some resources we can give you to help you with these thoughts. We have a partner that you can help you through this. We are emailing you with a private number to call for help. It is one of our partners. If you need someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/. You can reach the Crisis Text Line 24/7 by texting “START” to 741-741 too.
Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources.
My husband committed suicide 7 months ago after an argument we had. I loved him more than anything on this earth and I feel so awful that HE felt so bad and that I must have caused it by what I said to him. I didn't mean anything I said, just as I didn't think he did when he was angry with me. I feel so bad that I could have made him feel so low. I don't know how to get over this; I feel like life is not worth living without him and sometimes I just don't know how I can go on. It was just a short argument and I said words I regret and apologized but I never thought he felt this bad. I loved him so much. I don't think he ever believed it no matter what I did. I'd do anything for him and I miss him so much. Seven months later I am still sobbing and sick every day. I don't think I'll ever recover.
GMJ, First of all, we are so sorry you lost him to suicide and feel your pain and hurt. Secondly, We are proud of you for reaching out to talk about his. It is not your fault he decided to die by suicide. It was his choice. Please do not blame yourself. It's is important that you give yourself permission to get professional help to talk about how you're feelings. Also, you are high risk, because of what you have experienced and we want you to know that you are valuable and worthy. We have some resources we can give you to help you if you ever have thoughts of suicide, yourself. We also have a partner that you can help you through this. We are emailing you with some information to help you so please check your email. If you need someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/. You can reach the Crisis Text Line 24/7 by texting “START” to 741-741 too.
Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources. Please read this blog about survivors of suicide loss: https://www.thehopeline.com/to-survivors-of-suicide-loss/ continue to see help and resources as you deal with your grief. You can also sign up for an email mentor too. It would be a woman that you can email back and for with for as long as you like. To sign up go to this page: https://www.thehopeline.com/emailmentors/
Dont do that. It wont solve your problem. It would be worse after your death. Pits of hell would be worse. If youre feeling alone try to read bible He is God He doesnt leave you, He loves us all that He sacrifise His son for us. Try to read bible you will find life and solution yo your problem.
I just want to die. It’s a horrible feeling waking up every day and wanting to die till I go to sleep. I don’t want help — I just want to be dead. There is nothing to live for.
Robert, You are valuable and worthy! It's good you are reaching out to talk about this. We have some resources we can give you to help you with these thoughts. We have a partner that you can help you through this. We are emailing you with some information to help you so please check your email. If you need someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/. You can reach the Crisis Text Line 24/7 by texting “START” to 741-741 too.
Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources.
Hey Robert ,
I feel the same like you. I feel my life is hopeless and full of misery. You are so right it would be much better if i would,t exist.